• jason in pc

    i cant do it, i will not be a firsty!

  • Paul

    my cat just flipped his food over and walked away so, yeah, there truth here.

    • Malachi Constant

      no doubt, spot on Chive!

  • MARK

    that was surprisingly hilarious

  • @Rham_Forktail

    So cats are basically Stewie from Family Guy. Good to know.

  • Lylah

    This has been around for years. Not sure where it first came from, but we had a copy of it posted in a veterinary hospital I worked for 3-4 years ago.

    • parlay

      I've never seen it before.

    • misty

      I've seen something like this as well, but this one is a different take on it. it's new

    • nemesis

      Agreed. Fairly sure I first saw this at least 5 or 6 years ago.

    • Jesse

      Yeah, this is at least 10 years old, I believe. I first saw it a long, long time ago. Good stuff.

    • Anonymous

      I think Jesus originally wrote this, while bored one day, so it must be at least 2011 years old. At least.

    • Anonymous

      My great-great-great grandfather, an archeologist, actually originally discovered this text, as hieroglyphics on a cave wall, in a Northern province of China. His last dying words were… "I hope this makes it to The Chive someday."

    • drbeene

      Alas, it's at least from 1995:


  • GTO

    This is completely true. Cats are schemers and prima donna's

  • boooger

    The dog is obviously retarded. that line made me snort coffe on the keyboard.

  • Rusty

    I've seen a rougher version of this somewhere before. this one is much more polished. really enjoyed it

  • _HypoLuxa_

    TheBerry: The difference between cats and dogs (3 Photos) . . .

  • Mello-


  • hot carl

    Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

    • Sandman

      by Neil Gaiman.

      • cantkillcastro

        My favorite game is playing slipper tag with my wifes cat…. sometimes I leave my foot in the slipper.

  • yoav^^^

    this is soo old!
    i got it like 3 years ago maybe

  • onlyChange

    strange.. now they are there

  • Ace

    You own a dog, you feed a cat.

  • Shannon Coverdale

    Cats are delicious

  • Evelyn Ponce Quintero

    omg that was

  • Mike Engler

    this is absolutely hilarious! and 100% accurate.

  • abrewer15

    I hate cats.

    • Phontsolo

      Cats hate you.

      • Conor

        Cats hate everyone?

  • Fortunatza

    This made me pee my pants from laughing so hard. Thanks, now I get to sit around in soggies all day.

  • rUBEN

    This is just hilarious! Find the blogger, that is now necessary!

  • MattFoley

    This is so old! I've seen it on a website, like, in 1975.

    • northerner

      So what. Still hilarious.

      • MattFoley

        sarcasm alert

  • TylerV

    Dog: "Pooped outside. My favorite thing!"

    • Conor

      Hmm, my dog would be more like "Pooped on the rug. My favorite thing!"


  • Brah

    This always makes me laugh. As an owner of 3 cats and a dog, it's pretty damn true.

  • Codey

    I saw this in Funny Times a year or two back

  • Diana Santos

    i just love both equally…<3

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