I’ll take my eggs with a side of “Awesome” (29 Photos)

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  • Mr. Fancypants

    Well, this really isn't all that exciting.

    • http://www.facebook.com/schizoronialfredo Nathaniel Patrick Fancypants

      On the other hand, I would believe absolutely anything from a man who dual-wielded minigun-rods and was giving out needles full of Nutella. That guy would be my new god for the week.

    • Gooberhead

      It really isn't executing to see the app that I fucking paid for stop working yet again!!!

      • A Fan

        Seriously Chive, fix your app!

  • Martin

    Tongue-tied.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001668622772 Bobba Fett

    #17

    They shopped the poop falling out of a pants leg on this one.

    • Zoey

      No, there's a glass floor on the tower. I've been there.

      • LukasS

        I believe he's making a joke

        • Anonymous

          If you have to explain it, it's an awful joke.

          • Your Mom's Dog

            If you need it explained to you, then you're an awful person.

    • rubbercrutch

      Shanghai's Oriental Pearl Tower. its Legit.

  • Santos El Halper

    If I was at a Barbecue, and there was no meat, I'd be like "Hey Goober, where's the meat?"

    • minnesota

      HILARIOUS MAN! THIS IS SOME GOOD ASS SHIT RIGHT HERE! GAHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

    • Forest

      You don't win friends with salad.

  • karen

    hello anyone?

    • jamesaholic

      hello

    • Ravienne_Cullen

      Lonely in the box of shame, isn't it?

  • Mr. Nick

    #7 – that shadow really adds the finishing touches to an awesome photo.

    • Guz

      If you noticed the shadow I've got bad news for you.

      • aosux

        I was like, 'What the hell is he talkin about?'

        • http://www.facebook.com/5dobermans Beth Vogel

          Looks like a dude's hand…

    • Philo

      I never noticed the shadow until i read the comments….I passed !!

    • The Spicy Italian

      ' Merica! (Looks toward Canada)

    • http://facebook.com/denzino denzino

      "shadowbomb" anyone?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1788105749 Mate Bozanic

      The Great Horny Eagle

  • TheRocker

    #28 Before and after on the same picture.

  • zero

    #9 I said GODDAMM!!!!

    • Fisheyes

      Awesome Pulp Fiction reference! Well played, sir.

  • hater

    Vintage Chive.

    • Amishbob

      Thanks Michael Cole

      • hater

        YW DOUCHENOZZLE.

  • kkuhlers

    #27 THUMBS FOR AN AMERICAN BAD ASS!!!

    • jay

      american bad ass???? thats gay!!!

      • Anonymous

        If defending your country is gay then….. Ya know, its just easier to call you an idiot

    • amishbob

      Bad ass of the week covered him a little while back, and it was indeed…bad ass. http://www.badassoftheweek.com/whittemore.html

      • AnyoneForCoffee

        So this 'American Badass' was born in England, served for decades in the British Army and didn't actually arrive in the US until he was 45.

        Awesome.

        • Anonymous

          He spent more than half of his life in the US, and – thus – deserves the title. Also, he was a badass.

        • Askew

          He wasn't the first british officer to serve America when we declared our independence. And kicking british ass at 80 years old is badass..

        • NavyAdam

          It took him 45 years but he finally saw the light! LOL

        • The Spicy Italian

          Most of the continental army came from England

    • P90

      More like thumbs for the British model in your avi.

      • http://www.facebook.com/JustinVincentHall Justin Hall

        Thumbs for the ass? I think that's what made Whittemore kill those soldiers in the first place.

    • Lisa_Martin

      I don't care if he was English by birth. He took out 3 other Englishmen. On American soil. If he wasn't American before, he DAMN sure was after. I want men like this on our side.

      This guy is probably Chuck Norris' great-great-great Grandfather.

      • The Knowledge

        You want a traitor on your side?

        • Jules

          Seeing as how America was founded by people betraying their own country… Yeah, I would want him on my side:)

        • Lisa_Martin

          @"The Knowledge"

          An American patriot that KILLED people from his birth country? YOU BET YOUR FUCKING ASS I DO. Every damn day.

          • Mike

            Typing in caps and bolding those caps doesn't make your statement more meaningful

            • kkuhlers

              Sure it does… AMERICA!

    • Paul
    • flibertygiblet

      fuck yes! Most people didn't live to be half of his age!
      The British or "American" issue is irrelevant. We WERE British. It's just that The crown and some of Parliament forgot what their own revolution taught them (taxation w/o representation doesn't fly far) not that long before. History repeated itself only on American soil. Also there were many men noble and common who sympathized with us. As an American I Love our country yet I also love Britain because we are cut from the same cloth.

  • TheMan

    #4 I wish I had those toys…

    • Your Mom's Dog

      I do…er, I mean, my son does…

  • miiike

    #24 ??? #25 actually peter parkers parents were spys and im a little hazy on my marvel since i dropped caring for them since disney but peter was given to his uncle ben because his parents had to go awol

    • Butler

      Everything my two minutes worth of research told me is that your wrong… they died in a plane crash… i can really see how you would get awol and spies out of that “plane“ old death.. and yes pun intended

      • LukasS

        Your pun was too telegraphed to be a pun

      • Merc

        Actually he's right, they were agents of shield and an assassin hired by red skull sabotaged their plane.
        Morale of the story, If you're going to say someone is wrong. make sure you're right.

        • joshdyk87

          MORAL of the story, If you're going to say someone is right, make sure you can spell.

          Grammar Nazis, awaaaaaay!!!

          • Merc

            Oh i'm sorry, why don't I paste that shit into Word next time just to please your bitch ass.
            And yes that's sarcasm… Just incase you missed it as you're probably more intent on finding more mistakes rather than reading the post.

          • Ryan

            You misspelled away.

        • evazen

          A plane crash is a plane crash… this is just a case of everyone whipping it out on the internet to see whose is bigger. A Marvel e-peen size-up.

          • http://www.facebook.com/tylermars.design Tyler Mars

            you guys all need to see what a vagina looks like, you might put down the fucking comics…………

            • femtrooper

              If I read them naked, I can do both at the same time. 😛

              • http://www.facebook.com/tylermars.design Tyler Mars

                well played….well played……

              • http://thechive.com/ mattythegooch

                Femtrooper shoots, and scores………..

              • Zeus

                WIN

              • Why Not?

                can i read them with you?

  • tommybhoy

    #4 Thats it!!! Am going to buy a Lego Star Wars set for the office…

  • St.Christopher

    boring.

  • Jules

    Where did you get photo number 6#? It's awesome!

  • that-weed-dude

    #8 i don't get it

    • http://twitter.com/EricDLarson4278 @EricDLarson4278

      That's the point dumb ass.

    • + blitzkrieg

      exactly.

    • Logic76

      Bing!

    • jsk

      its cock head sandwich

  • Vince

    #8
    Bitches love animals. A sammich. "Bitch, make me a sammich".
    Picture related.

    • Guest

      No.

  • Head chef

    #17

    Is that in Shanghai?

    • Zoey

      Yes. It's that tower that's in all the futuristic movies.

  • silkystealthsurgeon

    #16

    need to know more!

    • JerseyBean

      rotate 90 degrees clockwise…. that is all

    • andfukyamoms

      you need to erase that comment before everyone figures out how smart you are

  • evrasleftboot

    what is #24 ??

    • amrith777

      SERIOUSLY???I am a woman and not even a Star Wars fan–and even *I* realized what this is AND why it's funny.

      • HANK

        So wtf is so funny about it u silly bitch we're waiting

      • Jules

        I dont get it either:(

        • Miss T

          Help me Obi-wan Kenobi, you're these idiot chivers only hope…

          • ChrisJ5285

            its buffering ass holes hahaha! like when streaming loads of video is too hefty and it has a bit of a hold up.

          • Deka

            Video buffering…sigh…

        • Mike

          Wow, I don't get why some people type out these dumb insults to others when they can simply explain what the picture is about…

          Anyways, the picture is a still from Star Wars. Long story short, they are shown a clip of the Princess (the one shown) asking Obi Won Kinobi for help. Star Wars takes place a "long time ago in a galaxy far, far away"

          Whenever you go to watch a clip on the internet now, you have to wait for the clip to finish buffering. The joke is that if it were now, Obi Won would have to wait for the Princess clip to finish buffering before he could hear her cry for help.

    • Royce

      There's a picture of justin bieber near her crotch.

  • Zoey

    #10 FTW!

  • GTO

    #19 that is pretty creative

    • Not First

      Yes, quite clever.

      • Kevrobmc

        This was actually done by a guy that works with my mate, he showed me the original pic like 3 days ago. Goddamn Chivers are everywhere!!

  • FLHomesteader

    …I'm still singing I wish I was a little bit taller…..

    Thanks Chive

  • dentonbeard

    #29 ! Needle-Nosed Ned, FTFW!

    • Ned the Head

      Am I right or am I right or am I right … Right…right

  • http://www.facebook.com/bill.newman Bill Newman

    #7 why is there a bird shadow?

    • Forest Gump

      Because bitches love bird shadows.

    • Mr F

      Does it matter? Ass!

    • Assumption

      Gay test: failed

      • why not

        it's from a website called eroticfalconry.com

        • Joel

          LOL Wtf is wrong with you? Its there, though.

    • + blitzkrieg

      Really? you see a picture of two girls grabbin' ass and you ask about a fucking bird?

      • cantkillcastro

        I dunno, the hand grabbin ass looks like a man-hand. I think it's a dude in pink manties. I aint judgin… just sayin.

    • Robert

      I'm just as into seeing female ass as the next guy but i still have to wonder why the fuck theres a bird shadow in it. Its distracting as hell. Anyone else dissenting against the question about the shadow defending their heterosexuality is a closet fag. Good day.

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