Valentine’s Day Sucks (36 Photos)

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  • alex

    First comment… common.

    • MRPOOP

      BALLS IN YOUR MOUTH..COMMON

  • sam

    FIRST!!! OMG THIS IS THE FIRST TIME FOR ME

    • If you said so...

      NT, but I saw when the first three comments had no +'s or -'s, so it was a close fight.

    • TheAutomaticMan

      Congrats….. nailed it.

    • Velociraptor

      Nope, still a virgin.

    • gmen

      you waited around for who knows how many minutes waiting for a post, the post finally came, you got all excited thinking you were going to be the first person to post a comment only to find out that you couldn't even do that right. you sir, suck at life.

    • MRPOOP

      BALLS IN YOUR MOUTH

      • hee

        .

  • tom

    #14 such a shame that this doesn't work.

  • Wark

    #11 "Don't worry about me, I've got big plans. I'm going to have sex with the Declaration of Independence!"

    In the Cage is one of my favorite SNL skits.

    • Cosby Sweater

      That's high praise.

  • Mad_Hittman

    #6 Unfortunately, that's exactly how I feel…

  • J0R

    Don't know whether to study, watch champions league, or spend time with the girlfriend.

    • Google

      First world problem.

    • FWP

      Champions league. Defs champions leagure

  • tbone

    #34 marry this woman, stat.

  • http://www.thechive.com Penrath

    #34 …. hard to tell.. was the note written by a guy or a girl?

    Written By a Guy: He better have something other than his "lightsaber" waiting for her upstairs.
    Written By a Gal: Epic! That is all.

    • Ander

      Im gonna say woman because I want to believe these kind of girls exist.

      • http://www.thechive.com Penrath

        They do exist…Take Paula for example…. We just don't realize that they exist because she consumes them after they find out.

        Sort of like Yeti and UFO sightings? o.0

    • jimbojones

      Not many guys would a) go to this much effort or b) sign the note 'XOXO'.

      Unless their SWTOR character name was 'Xoxo'. Hmmm… I guess it could be a guy.

    • chito

      i say written by a lady coz real men no write "xoxo"

    • Lil John

      What I want to know is why it's just so wild for chicks to, like, do stuff. The sex comes with the relationship, baby. It's not a favor.

      So when chicks actually DO STUFF it's crazy memorable and sweet.

      -end whiny bitchfest-

      • Emanon

        You spend your young life as a nerd believing that girls won't love you for your nerdiness. You believe that liking Star Wars and video games buys you a one way ticket to being a virgin until you can afford to pay for sex.

        There are nerdy girls among us now…and Star Wars isn't the instant v-card that it might have once been. So excuse us for being excited that there are now girls who not only tolerate Star Wars (and our other nerdly obsessions), but actually enjoy it/them and incorporate it into the relationship.

        • Gregoero

          Star Wars blow chunks.

    • Wallmaster

      : / damn…. too awesome.

  • aaron

    #6 we've all been there 🙂

  • fr2xedom

    #34 Almost teared up now that's as close as where going to get to the force on earth lol

  • Ander

    #19 Want to get more bj's? Buy her a gift within 48 hours after every time you get one. Flowers, candy, some inexpensive jewelry, food, little things. Before you know it youre getting weekly bj's. Trust me. it worked with many girls ive dated. Girls love stuff.

    • JOHN

      the exchange of gifts for sexual favors = whore. just sayin

      • dylsmith@gmail.com

        Yeah, but…. BJs

        • Edd

          yeah but money spent, just get a hooker

        • Lil John

          BJs are part of the package, not special.

      • Art

        In one way or another, don't we all have to "buy" a woman's affection? And if you think I am wrong, get her nothing for Valentine's Day And see how much lovin you get tonight.

    • Dman

      Get a pack of altoids. Give her a mint before every bj you get. Eventually you'll condition her to drop your pants just by giving her a mint….Also careful her co-workers/friends don't give her mints =/

    • JamieLHi

      Conditioning theory 'Law of Effect'. Positive reinforcement/satisfaction increases a behavior.

    • Cowboy1354

      Oh you mean "Bitches love stuff" that last sentence had me confused.

      • Ander

        I don't call my woman a bitch. But ya. It's pretty much training. Sounds worse like that but thats about what it is.

  • steve

    #30

    and after he gave back all of the valentine's day gifts to all of the couples. Mr. Hairy Sasquatch (the Grinch of Valentines Day) back hair heart grew 3 sizes that day.

    -the end

  • Vol_5

    Don't lose heart guys, march 14th is our redemption for this shit

    • freddy boy

      I believe that's March 17th, bro.

    • KFAD

      I must not be in the loop. Don't you mean the 17th?

      • Mike

        He's referring to Steak and Blowjob day…..

    • skip

      that's Pi day

    • Misfit7734

      steak and blowjob day is the best

  • sit ubu sit good dog

    #19…….Yes , yes they are !

  • http://thechive.com/ Joe

    Misspelled you're…
    #15

  • sllimcat

    there is only one thing that sucks on V day !!
    the rest of the year —–NOTHING——-

    • Pointed Sticks

      Blowjobs?

  • mickdeck

    #34 I bet that dude's room mate thought this was a weird thing to come home to.

  • myself

    #33 Poor Sad Scherbatsky.

    • Awesome PDT

      How I met your mother

    • Shaun

      why was she crying again I forgot

  • mitch

    #36 Can't tell if funny or depressing

    • POSTdiluvian

      made me cry, so I'd go with funny

  • mcthr33

    #23 Sudden Death….They just don't make em like they use to.

    • meh

      thank god

    • rphilman1

      AWESOME movie!!!

  • MaxxyWaxxy

    Happy Forever Alone Day!

  • Cosby Sweater

    #17 It's not easy to find quality, inexpensive cabernet sauvignon. There's plenty of cheap cabernet out there, but most of it is either too tannic, too green (with flavors resembling bell peppers), or too grapey to bother with. In fact, this is one of the few areas where the Wine Curmudgeon has mostly given up finding decent wine for $10 or less.

    When you raise the price bar to $15, the standard has always been Avalon's Napa cabernet, which offers a bit of sophistication and style with plenty of quality California fruit. I've always thought the Avalon was superior to wines that cost $20 and more.

    Which is why the 337 (about $15, sample) was such a pleasant surprise. I had tasted a previous vintage a couple of years ago when my Cordon Bleu class did its red wine extravaganza, but had not thought much about it until last week. That's when I saw this bottle in the back of the wine closet and remembered that my class had enjoyed the wine. If the 337 is not up the level of the Avalon, that's not an insult. It has cherry fruit that isn't overdone and the requisite varietal characteristics — zingy tannins and a decent finish. It's a red meat wine for cooler fall nights. One note: You might find some of the 2008 vintage, which should be OK.

    And the name? 337 refers to the name of the clone of cabernet used to make the wine. What's a clone? It's a version of cabernet that has been bred for a specific purpose. In this case, 337 is the clone of cabernet used to make the wine.

  • vodkamartini

    #32 Herpes: because I love u

  • Zxg

    What show/movie is #33 from?

    • om nom nom

      HOw i met your mother

    • Awesome PDT

      How I Met Your Mother. It's one of the newer episodes.

  • spartus

    #30 anyone notice this shit? look at the middle of his pants, its like its connected to his skin on his back. wth?

    • jiz

      "look at the middle of his pants, its like its connected to his skin on his back."

      no, you're just an idiot

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