Random facts that will have little to no impact on your life (19 Photos)

Via Somethingawful



Via Somethingawful

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  • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

    #8
    Did you know that is Africa?

    • noshiat

      …that's the joke.

      • TracerBullet_PI

        <img src="http://i55.tinypic.com/34pcq9y.jpg"/&gt;

        My guess is anyone who thought they "caught them" by realizing it wasn't india fell for all the ones prior to that.

        • hokiemct

          sooo true.

        • wistfulD

          Well, except for the lemon/lime one, they all seemed like they could be true, and I noticed that they started out with one that was at least partially true.

          • A bipolarguy

            No, no they don't. Only 2 or 3 of them require specialized knowledge or knowledge of trivia to see through. Chinese tipping the earth, autistic fish, rice potato seeds, avacado weed, volcano vitamins, etc – seriously, these seemed possible to you?

    • Frank

      Did you know these are all pretty much Tongue in Cheek?

      • Anuts Slicker

        I'd like to put my tongue in between your cheeks

    • OHChivette

      HA- I noticed that too!

    • TomTheCameraGuy

      The Chive learned how to troll

      • ...

        Did they learn from bullet?

      • Guesty McGuest

        Most fun I've ever had reading the comments on any Chive post.

    • ...

      Did you know that you missed out on the whole fucking joke?

    • Tomas

      I think The Chive is exactly one month early (today being MARCH 1st). 🙂

    • Eric

      wow that takes some serious skill to mess up that badly

      • ArticJester

        Like you just did?

    • brett

      I was believing everything up until i read this one, then i got the joke. i even believed the lemon limes one, wtf is wrong with me

      • Pete

        I did have to Google the Royal Mail one… I mean, in 2012 UK it does sound kinda plausible.

    • Farnsworth

      You know, if you tilt africa approx 45 degrees to the left, it loosely almost looks like Australia.

    • Biggus Diccus

      Yeah and the Earth is tilted because of chinks….tard

    • Hunter X

      Chive: With the number of comments thinking ANY of these are true has me convinced to NEVER, NEVER, NEVER again try to argue with a knucklehead on your site. Ever.

      eh-vah.

    • Boo Radley

      Did you know this entire article was a spoof?

    • Lisa

      is this jokeception?

    • Firesmack

      These facts all came from FOX news.

      • J2k

        Heeeelarious

    • mittens

      Fact: at least 464 Chivers have "Slow Children Playing" signs in front of their homes.

      • Slow Children

        Correction: at least 520, and one of them is butthurt.

    • Boat

      You beat me to it. lol

    • Natasha

      YES THANK YOU! I had to do a double-take because I was like, "Really? REALLY??"

    • Kenton

      150% times more? LOL so what is it, 150 times more? 1.5 times more? times needs to be taken out or the percent symbol does.

      • dude

        Raj cuz that's the only thing wrong with that picture.

  • Bob Izumi

    Last?

    • MRPOOP

      FIRST TO HAVE THE BALLS IN YOUR MOUTH

  • slow

    first

    • Bob Barker

      Its funny that everyone is getting upset… NONE OF THESE ARE FACTS… they are all jokes people…let it go… its supposed to be funny…

    • MRPOOP

      BALLS IN THE MOUTH

  • jake

    i love useless random facts!

    • rich

      you mean useless random fiction

    • chiveisliars

      how about random lies and misinformation? theChive really needs an editor or fact checker.

      • iChive

        You're going to feel really stupid when you grow a sense of irony.

        • Dwight E.

          and you're (ichive) going feel really stupid when you find out what irony actually is, this set of pictures is in no way ironic. Irony is a game of opposites, not of random bullshit. A toothbrush that ends up destroying your teeth = irony.

          • iChive

            …And here I thought "irony" was how my mouth tasted after I destroyed my teeth with a toothbrush.

            Thank you, Dwight E., for being a living definition of the concept.

    • etcrr

      i love usless random comments

    • brian

      these aren't facts. There jokes. come on now

  • r@f

    #9 really?

    • negativesm00th

      you're an idiot.

      • r@f

        well obviously you dont know if you're getting trolled either.

        • Dick Salad

          Congrats, really sticking it hard today with the weak ass trolling. Chive shouldn't post this shit too many morons will take all of these literally. Plant rice… grow potatoes…

          • Theycall Metater

            I just planted rice in my baff-tub

            • Dick Salad

              You mean baby potatoes right?

              • Hom Taverford

                I call rice… short ass spagetti.

          • deathscythe257

            as a regular consumer of rice, I was speechless until I realized I was being trolled

    • Adrian

      I want to dislike, but i'll leave it at -69

  • dwight

    #8 is actually africa..

    • Daynegerous

      Yes. LOL !

    • David

      Not to mention the majority of greenhouse gasses produced by India and China are related to production for American consumer markets. We outsource our industry to these countries, and therefore outsource our greenhouse gasses, but the demand for the consumer products that are responsible for those gases is still in the U.S. and Europe.

      • Makaveli

        ya and since there are 9 billion people in india, per capita their greenhouse gas emissions would be a small fraction of what it is in the US or Canada

        • Karla

          LMFAO There is NOT 9 billion people in India! There isn't 9 billion people in the world! There's roughly 1 billion people in India. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

      • Dax

        Are you just saying what you feel is right here? If not, then why haven't we found a way to outsource our greenhouse gases to Canada and the EU, seeing how those are 2 of the US's top 3 trading partners? China IS the other top 3, but India is WAY down on the list. Facts are tricky things

    • Kourt

      hahaha I feel dumb for not noticing that. Just let it slip right by me. Nice catch 🙂

  • RRD

    Pretty sure this should have been posted the first of NEXT month.

  • jasgat66

    #6 Can the same be said for the Chicago Cubs?

    • Dude

      I can't be entirely sure, but I believe that every political position is filled with autistics in Chicago.

    • Mike

      Good thing our tap water comes straight from there… I need to go watch the Peoples Court, definitely time to watch the Peoples Court.

      • Luck

        Call me Ace.

    • Brutal Deluxe

      Do you think I can put down 'fish autism tester' on my resume?

    • Thomas

      Clearly bullshit. I live in Milwaukee, guess where we get our drinking water?

  • schnizz

    i need a shovel for all this bullsh*t!

  • Verbal_Kint

    Did you know, at least half of this post is factually incorrect? Still cute though.

    • Kyle

      its a joke

    • Boom!_Headshot!

      i think all of it is false

      • Verbal_Kint

        Nintendo isn't.

        • Nargon

          Nintendo is the only one that is true, everything else is just one month early 🙂

  • DemonDan

    Did you know Duct Tape has been turning 'No! No!' into 'mmph! mmph!' since 1942?

    • chiveisliars

      hilarious

    • Binder

      True story…

      • John87

        Silence is golden….Ductape is silver

  • Jack_LeMac

    #13 Seems to be the only one you fact-checked

    • zimzum

      who is that?

      • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

        Shaka Khan.

        • Lame Ass

          Typical of you lame ass Chaka Khan

      • Bud

        Bob Dole

      • chris

        Guy on the bottom is Barney. I don't know the other dude.

    • zimzum

      lol

  • CodeName

    I'm pretty sure that last one is completely false. Sweating has to do with temperature regulation, not getting rid of excess water. #20

    • CodeName

      *has nothing to do

      • CodeName

        damn it, was correct the first time. I think I'm done now.

    • orly
      • F.S.M.

        Well played sir.. Well played

        • rer

          shut up

      • NJF

        Holy shit, the ORLY owl. Haven't seen that in forever.

    • gromtown

      yeah this is straight bullshit. sweat your balls off and dont drink water…yeah really smart

      • Lil John

        and then you die.

    • Jenkins McGee

      NAILED IT.

    • MissingTheJoke

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    • Nick

      I'm pretty sure listening to this fact will get you heat stroke

      • Jeff

        When you stop sweating, I believe that's a sign of heat stroke.

    • jrolly

      this ones def. gonna get some dumb ass killed completely false

  • http://www.mafia-wars.com Mike

    #19
    WHAT?????

    • http://www.mafia-wars.com Mike

      the "manufacture" of Marijuana? Its not manufactured its grown and growing it has NOTHING to do with avocados

      • Underbaker

        Well what do you think them South American people eat who grow our Marijuana?

      • Tarah

        Yeah I'm honestly very disappointed with this post especially this picture because there is no correlation between the two. Really upsetting Chive, not to mention that #20 could potentially get people killed because unfortunately people are that stupid.

    • junior

      I think whoever came up with this post is smoking avocados….

    • gromtown

      fucking stupid again.

    • nate

      Come on guys this is the dumbest thing I've ever seen on your site. I've seen weed grow and harvested and I can say with 150% certainty there wasn't an avocado for miles. how about about a little common sense.

      • ChicO85T

        you sir are retarded

        • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

          maybe he's a fish from Lake Michigan and he's just autistic.

        • Corky

          you take that back…he doesn't come close to meeting the requirements of a retard…potato

        • saskchivertoon

          Obviously he just wants to grow some rice potatoes.

      • sdago25

        How long did it take you to see weed grow?

        • dagos52

          *sea

    • Mibutt Snores

      I don't know what the mole you're talking aboot, poop

  • gmen

    go ahead and slap yourself if you took any of these seriously

    • Underbaker

      I'm just sad it took me up to #9 to realize it was all BS, I was suspicious with 2 though.

    • JustSuper

      I slapped myself.

  • 2pumpdump

    I call bullchit

    • luke

      chut up

      • 6655321

        Go back to China, bitch.

  • Carl

    #9 whaaaaaaaaat

  • TomTheCameraGuy

    Lol, I love how some of these are true, and others are just complete bull shit. #12 Really? Boiling water destroys mass? And potato seeds? Jesus…

    • TomTheCameraGuy

      And by some, I mean only the thing saying nintendo means leave luck to heaven…

    • Jesus

      Please stop using my name in vain.

      • TomTheCameraGuy

        Sorry.

        Lighten up a bit, Christ….

        • Christ

          Yea that Jesus guy is getting on my fucking nerves too

    • elliott

      #12 IS A LIE! CONSERVATION OF MASS IS A SIMPLE AND OLD LAW THAT CANNOT BE DEFIED.
      chive do your research

      • USF Bull Rugger

        I don't know what crazy religion you belong to and the "law" you are speaking of, but you clearly have no idea what you are talking about..

        It's long been known that water ceases to exist once turned into steam…

      • Mike

        U sir are dumb thinking any of these are true SMH

  • BarrowsBOY

    I call bullshit on at least half…mainly #12 (Conservation of mass anyone?) even the ones that are true are wrong in some aspect… #8

    • katie

      really only on half?

    • TommyD

      If by "some aspect" you mean a picture of the wrong country? They're all a joke to some extent.

    • Marc

      The india one is most likely correct, due to outsourcing most industrial processes that release tonnes of co2 occur in india,china, etc

      • davo

        THEY'RE ALL BULLSHIT YOU FUCKING IDIOT

      • Duke

        Not a chance. Western people own vehicles, eat huge amounts of meat, have closets full of clothes, require heating and water for giant condos and houses–our PETS have bigger carbon footprints than 10 families living in a shantytown.

  • Seriously?

    I'm not a genius or anything, but I'm pretty sure not one of these is true. DON'T BE A MINDLESS LEMMMING!!!!

    • Seriously?

      Ok, I'll admit when I'm wrong. The Nintendo fact is true.

  • Chubby Wubby

    some of these facts seem a little fishy to me especially #13 … she strikes me more as a donut person

  • nono

    #8 At least show India, not Africa…

  • 99mike

    Did you know that 99% of the above pictures/facts are B.S.?

    • jeralin

      It's actually only 95%, since #1 is true. Math, motherfucker!

      • 99mike

        Man…you f*ck your mother once, ONCE I tell you, and you are labelled for life!

  • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

    #19
    Did you know hemp oil cures cancer? Google phoenixtears.
    True story, not trolling.

    • drea619

      and hemp products would help cure our economy but the pharmacuetical companies dont want you catching on.

  • Verbal_Kint

    did you know, Google search starts for "rice, potato seeds" is going through the roof today?

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