Brittney Palmer is using the Twitter machine properly (38 Photos)

If you've been to a UFC match recently, you've probably gotten a Chive On hurled your way from a stunning blonde in the ring. When UFC Octagon girl Brittney Palmer came to theCHIVE offices, she was quick to point out that she was one of the first to download theCHIVE iPhone app. I liked the girl immediately.

Perhaps the best part about Brittany is she's a guy's girl; she's smart, sarcastic and fun, basically all the elements you desire in a woman with some serious upgrades that include a weapons-grade tush and a 100-Watt smile.

Brittney is very active on Twitter and theCHIVE so stop by and say hello, she'll say hi right back.

Brittney's Twitter page right here.

Brittney’s Twitter Machine.

  • Paula_

    AND FJIHAARRASTT AGAINSIES!!!!11!!!!!! I SOOOO fucking rule and am totally not [censored].
    Did she used to be a guy meow?

    OH! And shall I sing "FIRST" againsies?? I will if you minions want to hear it againsies…

    – Fan testimonial: "Dear Paula, I love you like a fat kid love cake, like a prostitute loves a john, Like a Emo loves razorblades, Like skinny jeans love lowering peoples chances of having kids, Like a chubby girl loves hohos, like a bulimic loves a good puke, like a warm BJ on a crisp morning, like a woodchuck loves chucking wood if a woodchuck could chuck wood and like a good woman loves a kitchen. Paula, you are the ying to the Chives yang…You complete us <3"

    • Joe

      Wow, it must REALLY suck to have this be such a highlight of your life.

      • Paula_

        I am the highlight of YOUR life…. Meow THAT's sad!

        – Fan testimonial: "Bob or not, Paula has got to be part of the Chive staff – Maybe you're that HOPA chick? Who knows. Who cares. We like Paula as much as we like Bob and the rest of the Chive. It's all good and I'm not complaining one bit – I think the Chive rocks! I just have a pretty good feeling that everything is not all that it seems with this Paula character."

        • Ricky Ross

          I would love to punch you right in the ovary

      • Scott

        Couldn't have said it better myself. Very sad for her.

    • HOOK

      You outta check yourself in.

    • Caught!!

      I saw what it said under [censored]!! Also that was changed AFTER the first reply! That can only be done when what it said was true, so you're caught!!

    • 99bags

      Fuck Paula, you made me smile against my will again…..must fight troll….must resist Paula's persistence….must not thumb up! AAAHHHGGHH

      • Paula_

        What's '99bags' meow?
        …If you'd collect 99 Chivers you could call it '99Dbags' though…

        – Iiiiii'm…
        FIIIIRST… to think that you, you lie to me
        I'm FIIIIRST, way down deep inside of me
        You said your love was true
        And we never ever, ever part
        Meow you want someone new
        And it breaks my heart

        • Mary Knowles

          Hey Paula,

          I'm a 24 year old busy chick that's working out a ton and looking to get into shape. What's your diet and eating plan.

          Mary 🙂

          • Paula_

            FIRST of all, please please please tell me you misspelled 'busy'. I like my 24 year olds wih an extra 't' there.

            And my diet and eating plan? Dunno why that matters meow, but here it is:
            Diet Plan: Don't.
            Eating Plan: Whatever's within reach.
            So, as you can clearly see, I'm working hard to get into shape too. Round is a shape.

            – the one you love to hate

    • Paula_

      Ooohhh…. and did you see that totally handsome dude there in #18? The one who's HUGE erection draws so much blood from his system that he faints?

      – the one you love to hate

    • jeff donuts

      are u hott? doesnt matter ill still fuck u

      • RY!

        i dont care if she is either with that tude i bet shes a blast in the sack

    • Remy

      Your spelling and grammar is sending my cancer into remission.

      • Paula_

        So…. is that good or bad meow?

        – Fan testimonial: "I don't understand the general dislike of Paula_ I find it humorous to see how worked up everyone gets… successful troll is successful – DH"

    • Cat

      Aww, someone thinks she is a kitty meow, how quaint. Too bad she doesn't understand a troll can't be a kitty. =^.^=

  • will

    #11, #25

    I think a return trip to the chive offices are in order. wow.

    • next

      another white girl with fake tits and a flat ass…that's so original (yawn)

      • Nana

        Your penis is gay.

    • anony

      just another hot chick using thechive for publicity.

      • Always Last

        EXACTLY. Guess her Playboy pictorial didn't drum up enough momentum for her to do anything but walk around a ring with a sign at choreographed, homo-erotic event.

  • Jim


    • banana flapjacks

      thats sweet and all and im not complaining about the posts on women cause they are great but why waste one on a girl i can see naked on other sites. only do posts on women we cant yet see naked. dont really care when she has clothes on

  • david


    first to post a link to her Playboy spread wins:

    • Mike

      She looks much better in these PICs, Playboy did way to much with with the touch-up. In some it doesn't even look like her. It was kind of depressing 😦

      • Matt

        She also has weird looking boobs. I know everyone will reply with "you know how I know your gay?". I'm not saying she's not smoking hot, but the playboy pics were not very flattering.

        • Bink

          this link is better. And her tits look pretty good to me dude..

        • ArtieFartie

          "Not very flattering"?! Her boobs are fine, she has great legs, her ass is out of this world and her cooter looks like a vice grip. All in all I'd say it's pretty damn flattering.

        • Alouicious

          matt = gay…..she's fuckin unbelievable

    • Bink
    • Mike Litoris

      She didn't spread I already checked.

    • Jimmy

      She has a bald cooter.

  • craig

    Shaaaa Wiiiing!

    • yup

      I kinda wanna punch her in the face….

  • not you

    #15 Pretty girls are always better with talent

    • ParForeBeers

      #29 and a great smile

    • LucretiusCarus

      Guess she couldn't find a Fender…

      • yup

        I do hope that is a cheap gibson knock off… cuz.. she only thinks that she has talent because of all the people that want to tell someone pretty "You are SOOO talented!"…… she just isnt.

  • Shannon Coverdale

    Man, she is hot

  • warren


    I'm going to be stuck on that for the rest of the day

    • DoomsDayDub

      Damn, that ass is tight!

    • carl

      i just made squirties in my BVDs

  • Mr me


    • Ash

      That's the best you could come up with? "I WANT HER"??? Really? Get some originality before wasting time on the first page with your lame ass comments. She isn't going to read that, contact you and bang you. Yaaawwwwnnn.

  • Yosef

    #15 Talent i see

  • ISU Birds

    #7 #11

    She is an attractive individual….. But seriously, sooooo hot.

    • Kinger

      ISU all the way. Pub Wednesday.

  • Ned_Plimpton

    #25 I don't think any of us could afford that.

  • Dang

    I really want one of those guitars!

    • adam

      she does paintings for people…just request on on her website

  • workaday

    #17, #18

    We just got a new coffee machine at work and everybody was really happy. So this is… better

    • ????

      i fucking love yoga pants! wish it was a weekly post!!!!

  • Less Leo

    Flat ass.

    • Ned_Plimpton

      You spelled *amazingly fuckable wrong

      • ????

        kinda flat yeah…still awesome though….i would eat off of it…

  • Jezdezpez

    OMFG she is soo hot!!!!! Amazing body, wicked smile, look at that gap, she is PERFECT!

    • Ash

      Relax loser. She's not going to bang you because you went overboard on how hot she is.

      • Jezdezpez

        Someone's jealous lol, I bet you're fat and real ugly hoping one day someone would think you're sexy but alas you're not.

  • tralfaz

    #16 & #18 You lucky bastards, now I really hate my job.

  • Ricky Ross

    #15 Her talent comes in a close 2nd to her GAP

  • echogeo

    #7 #32
    Brittney, you have more curves than a round-a-bout.

    • Ash

      Really? More than 1 then? Most girls have more curves than 1.
      Nice try douchepickle.

      • F U

        You like pickles don't you?

  • Acesevens

    Yoga pants are made for that body.

  • NeckScarfJohnny

    also how douchey are John's intros now? Can they all really be the most down to earth girl?

    • workaday

      you mean because he chooses to be nice instead of snarky and then follows his comments with a bunch of photos of half naked girls for free? really douchey.

    • echogeo

      Not douchey so much as cookie cutter.
      "I'll let Ashley take it from here…"
      "I'll let Brittney take it from here…"
      "I'll let Cassie take it from here…"
      "I'll let Deidre take it from here…"
      "I'll let…"
      For someone so damn creative, you sure do take the short cut a lot.

      • jeremy sellers

        anybody read the chive in space article john wrote so well this morning, or the washington times article which is about as good as it gets imho?

        so he takes a shortcut, i wouldn't say he does it alot. and he follows it with boobs. haters gonna hate i guess

      • Vegas Chiver

        there's only one celebrity i ever met who offered to buy me a beer (and he was clearly busy and had better things to do), and that's John. I could care less how he writes or what he says about the girls but that's just me.

        • >..<

          Amazing how much free alcohol will help you form an opinion.

        • Hugh


      • John

        He's just following the same format.. Which is not douchey.. U sir. Being so picky.. R the one being douchey

  • Trainer

    She is by far the hottest octagon girl there is. And for the record, here is a link to the pics from Playboy – NSFW –

    • Paula_

      I work at Penthouse. Meow, is it still NSFW then?

      – the one you love to hate

    • >..<

      One step closer to heaven buddy. And those pics prove the whole one tit higher than the other issue.

  • Manx123

    looking smoking hot…..

  • alpha86

    #18 I laughed so hard. She's such a hottie

  • joe

    #7 omg hot hot HOT

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