Rockstar’s high school yearbook pictures are…well, very un-rockstar (30 Photos)


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  • arlo G

    #17 rest in peace

    • U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A

      I woulda killed myself too if i married that courtney love bitch……….!

      • edd

        courtney pulled the trigger on that shotgun

    • amrith777

      This so does not look like Kurt to me.I've seen many pics of him and somehow this one eluded me.

    • dashete

      Yeah, he is the only one that's dead on this list (I think)

      So it turns out being a rockstar isn't as bad for your health as you're led to believe.

      • YetiKing

        Dimebag died a few years back I think. But still pretty good odds.

        • leah_bee

          Dime was shot during a performance.

    • ANaverageCHIVER

      Thank you for your service.

    • Adam

      *sigh* I'm sorry guys, but the first comment being about Kurt Cobain when theres so many truly talented musicians on this list embodies how over rated the band and himself were at the time. He died at the peak of his popularity. Had he not killed himself, I honestly don't believe Nirvana would have made it through the 90's or still be around today. It's not that I don't like some of their music, I just think that when you sift through all the hype that they were not the greatest band to come out of the grunge era.

      • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

        I'm guessing you were probably in diapers during Nirvana's peak.

        • Adam

          Well then you would suck at guessing. I actually was in junior high when they hit their peak. Which I am assuming is the same time you were still wetting the bed.

      • Predatorian234

        I thought the same exact thing when I saw the first post.

      • PJC

        Yeah…Nobody from Nirvana is even famous anymore…Oh wait….

        • IMO

          Your point is irrelevant. Grohl has too much talent to never hit it big on his own. That man is a true rock god.

      • Kris

        THANK YOU. I am sick and fucking tired of hearing about how "great" this guy was. He was a whiny drug-addicted loser who got lucky and people swallowed the hype. Oh yeah, I'm sure you hate all that money and fame. You didn't mind all the heroin it bought.

        • yup

          Here Here!.. I bought into it in High School… but the more I saw interviews of this guy the more I realized he was a pompous prick… he didnt even respect his fans.. Long Live Dave Grohl!

    • mrlucky11

      Suicide = Coward

    • Swayze_roundhouse

      His music sucked so bad he killed himself. Fuck nirvana.

      • tempest

        There's actually a pretty good arguement for his music killing him. It all boils down to his insistence on a left handed guitar. He had scoliosis. If he'd chosen to suck it up like most lefties and learn on a righty guitar, the weight probably would have fixed his back, but on the other shoulder it pulled it farther out of whack causing severe pain in his back and stomach. That led to drug problems which led to the rest. Strange how such a small decision can change your entire life.

        • R-Dub

          That is one of the dumbest things i have ever heard.

        • spaceace

          I read that article.

    • admralackbar

      Most overrated band ever

      • elihpodep

        agreed X100

  • Chester

    Big brown lumpy floater

  • Theresia

    This is the best post! I love it!! #26 Trent Reznor… Smokin' hawt even back then. My high school heart would have fluttered each time he walked by! LOL

    • I'm thinkin

      Meh.

    • thebradhatter

      Looks like he could be related to Martin Short.

  • anon

    #14 Half face. Half forehead.

    • Cinzano

      They call that a fivehead

  • chris

    Ohhh yeah

  • rick

    #29 even then looked like a queer

    • rick

      I meant #20

      • Hugh

        Queer fags are so gay, right guys?

        • Barak Obama

          nope just you hugh

  • rick

    # 20 even then he looked super gay..

    • Hugh

      .. and?

    • potato

      But got laid for almost 40 years now. Your point is?

    • potato

      But got laid nonstop for almost 40 years now. Your point is?

  • viet

    No one really gives a rats ass about rock anymore…. I dnt know who most of these ppl are.

    • The Man

      What are you? Thirteen?

      • ed wood

        still waiting for that 1st pube…any day now…

    • RichMahogany

      Everyday I'm on the internet, I lose more hope. People such as you, viet, hasten the process..

    • Hugh

      I think you're on the wrong site.

    • vinnychase

      fool probly lives in tokyo and be bumpin dubstep and techno all day……..fuck you!!!!

      • spork

        they would do the same post with hip/hop and rap stars but they don't take year book photos in prison! Or 3/4 of those guys dropped out the day before picture day!
        Derrrrrrrppppp!

        • http://www.facebook.com/tj.huddleston Tj Huddleston

          Chive already did a rapper/hip-hop yearbook post… didn't they?
          But I still like how #23 Steven Tyler looks like the Joker

          • Guest

            HAHAHAHAHA Oh holy fuck… thank you. I hadn't laughed like that in a while.

        • yup

          nice!

    • RobiDoux

      (deep sigh)

    • mutant26

      As I sit here rocking out to Metallica and Iron Maiden on my laptop chiving, in my suit at my IT job in my office, I have a solemn FUCK YOU in my mind. You sir have no idea where any of your techno beats, hip hop, dubstep bullshit even originated from. Go read a rock history book fucknuts.

      • Projekt_J

        Couldn't of said it better myself

    • hark1985

      You suck! Go back to your hole man.

      • 80'sRage

        Funny, hark1985, I read that as "You suck! Go back to your manhole.", which, if you ask me, would be MUCH more appropriate.

    • Tony

      You're a fucking idiot. Plain and simple.

    • Deadpool

      You fail at life

    • Giggity

      You suck at life dude. You must be a fuckin Commie bastard.

    • Hooka

      Crawl back under your rock you incredible douche.

    • Pezski

      You, sir, are an idiot. Rock will never die!

    • https://www.facebook.com/joe.kroger.9 Joe Kroger

      Wow, I bet you're lots of fun to hang out with

      • viet

        Sorry guys all I heard was "blah blah blah, we're a bunch of old-fags". Go back to choking on Axl Roses' ginger-pubes.

        • Fish

          Go back to your Homeland and leave the music to us, you pre-pubescent little retard. Fuck off

    • NCeetard

      Also, no one knows how to spell anymore. Wouldn't want you to waste your precious time with all those extra keystrokes that punctuation and vowels require. I believe Bieber still has room for you in his fan club. Sorry let me type that so you know what said: hr Bbr still hs rm fr y n hs fn clb. You should go there.

  • http://cinemaplastique.tumblr.com MigraineBoy

    #11 See? Fred Durst likes N'Sync.

    • DDD

      i see your douche and raise you a douche…

      #12

    • Adam

      For a second I thought the Chive made a mistake and put a pic of Dawson Creek guy on the list.

      • Falthor

        no he looks more like that kid from seventh heaven… either way, douche then, douche now.

    • filthyslob

      i thought this was a list of rock stars

    • hwath

      A mother fuckin chainsaw, what?!

  • Flynn

    I'm 15 and rock is the only thing I ever listen to.

    • amrith777

      Good man!

    • edslerson

      u r 2 kewl man

    • Hugh

      Chive on young man.

    • The Man

      At least some kids out there have don't have their ass-cheeks resting on their shoulders. Chive on Flynn.

    • ddd

      You're young; you should expand your horizons.

    • RockON

      Just promise me you will never ever ever ever listen to hard-core rap and wear a baseball cap looking brand new and call other people "dawg" okay Flynn? Promise me!

      • thedude325

        …and always remember to take the label off the hat. Please, for the love of God.

    • dave

      You're really limiting yourself, every genre has something good.

    • http://thechive.com F3n1x187

      You are on the right track kid!

    • GuinessHangover

      You give me hope for future generations young man. However, no matter what MTV tells you, Nickelback is not rock. So steer clear of that detriment to music as we know it.

      • 80'sRage

        Who the hell watches MTV anymore??

        • GuinessHangover

          Teenagers, women, gay men… ever hear of a couple shows called Jersey Shore or 16 and pregnant? I despise both, but the wife watches them religiously…

    • Fish

      Flynn, you have our blessings to beat the shit out of Viet. School him, young man!

  • fabio

    #19
    this explain a lot of things

    • mac

      so true!

      • Brendan

        What is Scott Baio doing here. I didn't know Charles in Charge could sing.

        • crazydog

          marilyn manson cannot sing, unless you're comparing him to axl rose (if you are, manson is a fucking operatic tenor).

          • MattyDeuce

            Just saw him at Rock on the Range and he owned faces…and I had zero expectation for him coming into the show because I never saw him in his prime, so there's that.

    • Robert

      Give the kid a break. His parents were on the crazy cultish end of the spectrum for Christians and his grandfather was an animal fucking perv.

  • savagecabbage

    #2 looks like a little cunt there too

    • Brian

      looks high

    • http://thechive.com F3n1x187

      Still a douchebag at least that is stil constant, unlike his bandmates

  • Stacey

    #26 oh man Trent has definitely aged well.

  • amrith777

    #23 aka "The Joker"

    • sploodge

      they're some mean as lips Stevies rocking there

    • Daith_Lee

      LOL…I was hoping no one else would have posted that cause I was on my way to saying it myself.

      • Glaspotron

        Ditto. I mean he looks exactly like the Joker its effen creepy.

    • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

      looks a little like Andy Sandberg to me.

      • chucklesclown

        A little bit. If you squint and kind of tilt your head, he kind of looks like Sidney Crosby too. Weird.

    • Underbaker
    • Brian

      Why so serious?

  • mac

    #12 #20 cant believe these losers got so much pussy

    • Chris

      You obviously are very young. And stupid

    • The Woim

      I don't think they did; therefore they started a rock band…and vualah! Poon paradise.

    • Phil

      Well they did have their faces obscured for the 1st 90% of their careers. I'm basing the 90% on the awesomeness and not actual time.

    • Unfkngblvbl

      They could have been on The Big Bang Theory.

    • Underbaker

      It does explain why they used so much makeup when they started the band.

    • http://www.thechive.com BOoRadley

      Gene is definitely boss in that picture

    • SupraJeeper

      Gene Simmons, on Rush's lack of post-concert groupie banging: "even an ugly bastard like me can get laid."

      If you don't believe me go watch Rush: Beyond the Lighted Stage. It's in there.

  • Metal_Petals

    #9 Metal fro mullet…I dig. I feel a Pantera kind of day coming on.

    • thatguy

      How the heck did they let him put that his nickname was dimebag in the yearbook? I guess things really were cooler back then…

    • DUBU2DEATH

      DIMEBAG!!! FTW!!!

    • Liam GTFOMW

      Red Beard! RIP! RIDE FOR DIME!

    • MGS

      Actually, back then his nickname was "Diamond"

  • Awesom-o

    #2
    Rockstar? More like douche canoe.

    • marsy

      wait, you mean that's not Douchebag Bieber?!

    • Ned_Plimpton

      No. Definitely rockstar.

      • chucklesclown

        For sure. But he hasn't really been legit for 20-25 years.

  • F**CK YEAH

    #22 You mean to tell me he actually has a face?

    • twoedges

      He looks like a Jackson brother.

      • https://www.facebook.com/carieb12 Carie Bosch

        i was thinking more along the lines of lionel ritchie. LOL.

    • DonkeyPunch

      Looks like Juan Epstein from Welcome Back Kotter!

    • boll

      hes black?

      • GunsmokeJackson

        Half black, half British actually.

        • Underbaker

          So what color is British?

          • Ttime

            These days? Brownish.

            • DubStu

              Actual LOL!! 😀

  • Grandpa

    #18 Yes boys and girls the artist behind the South Park theme song was actually a musical genius

    • Hugh

      Wynona:
      <img src="http://www.jocelynlee.com/portraits/img/girl_holding_beaver.jpg?&quot; width="246" height="300">

      • Chrish

        That took me half a second to get. Bravo! /golfclap

      • Meh

        Not the beaver I was expecting but well played nonetheless, good sir!

      • Lou

        I recognize that smell.

    • Matt

      Primus sucks.

      • https://www.facebook.com/anthony.gomez.90 Anthony Gomez

        Indeed, Les would surely agree.

      • Greg

        lol at the downvotes. Primus sucks!

    • .....

      ….WAS????

    • 707drz

      he looks nothing like he did when a kid…he's been a customer of mine for about 10 years, good guy…great artist

    • cudaman

      I got to see them on the Sea of Cheese tour, they kicked ass. If I recall, they opened for Rush on that tour.

      • Fish

        Indeed they did, Sir. Rush was a huge influence on Claypool. And that was a great tour!

    • SupraJeeper

      Easily one of the best bassists ever. His Rush covers are painful to listen to though. At least his vocals work in Primus' original music.

  • ChrisDG74

    #2 – Looks like a ginger Bieber.

    • Ty4

      nailed it.

  • sploodge

    #13, seriously, give him some sideburns and a beard and he'd look the same as he did through the black album

    • The Woim

      Ah, the cowardly lion as a cub with a mini mane and everything! Animal that doesn't suck!

      • Master_Rahl

        Thought the very same. Hetfield always looked lion-like with the big hair. Add the growl and you complete the effect.

    • adsfdsaf

      HETFIELD IS GOD

    • AJ Rantz

      Dead spot on for sure!

  • Lyss

    #23
    Steven Tyler may not be hott there but he sure the hell is now 😉

    • Hugh
      • http://twitter.com/j_calabaza @j_calabaza

        Dude looks like a lady…

    • thatguy

      Wanna know how I got these scars?

    • ....

      this dude is, was, and always will be a douche nozzle. he's been trying to be mick jagger for 30 years now. what a fag.

    • ChiveMaster

      You like dudes that dress like old ladies? Ok then.

  • azlakelover

    this post is awesome. i miss real music. when people werent in it for the image or money. very few of those still out there

    • sploodge

      imagine if music become good again…. then we could all laugh at the generation that listened to gay emo crap and beiber…

    • TJ73

      Not in it for the money? You really think that?

    • tempest

      O ya, because these guys never thought for 2 seconds about their images… Come on! There are TWO members of Kiss in this post! Grown men who wore sparkly makeup and heels to make them look tougher. And Manson, same deal. There's actually a fair bit of good music coming out right now. At least, there's a lot more of it making it to the radio than when I was in school.

  • Arse

    #12 How many years did Gene have to repeat?

    • Bob

      Exactly! I thought this was a faculty photo.

    • Kyle

      He looks about 35 here.

  • tom

    #16 this clown can't even write music just steals riffs from other bands and adds lyrics

    • etcrr

      Maybe true, however he makes a lot of money doing it

    • Adam

      He's the white P Diddy!

    • Ned Ryerson

      certainly doesn't look "straight out the trailer"

    • thebradhatter

      Freddy Prinze Jr.?

      • Action

        Go Fuck yourself. Jerk offs

        • StonedPimp

          Big Kid Rock fan? Because in all fairness; A) He actually came from an upscale neighbourhood in Michigan. B) Has not made an original song in almost 10yrs.

          • huskernut

            still can entertain 🙂

    • iguardo

      Looks like McCauley Culkin

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