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  • I love the Chive

    second

    • levitating

      i have a question, if a girl is seriously ''hot'' (really trim with breast implants and bleach blonde hair or any color hair…etc) will she be taken seriously ..will she be a girl who you would consider bringing home to ma and pa or would she be a trophy …why am i asking this? because …this is chive and chive is therapy.

  • I love the Chive

    Chive, why you not have more t-shirts!?

    • http://www.gfys.org/ true

      get a life.

  • umpalumpa

    #3 #9 are freaky! and #33 is exactly what my dog does every time I let here outside!!!!

    • umpalumpa

      oops i meant her!

    • dfgdfs

      stop doing those freaky ones chive, lol, they haunt me

    • dude

      #3 looks like my girlfriends vagina, #9 looks like her ass hole

      • its_forge

        You… need to meet another girl someplace.

  • DutchChiveFan

    #1 is gonna loose her eyebrows

    • FionnR

      also has a rather nice bottom 😉

      • tongystunter

        not the sexiest thing ive seen but id still do it…

        • Adam

          'm pretty damn sure that's my wife. Proud day

    • Anthony

      Burn off eyebrows, draw them back on. Woman logic.

    • beasty

      Might burn her legs, eyebrows, face and all she's worried about is the smell. If that was me, I wouldn't be worrying about any of it.

    • Hmmmm

      I think you misunderstood the picture. The girl is trying to blow out the lighter with a queef.

    • Russell

      The word is "lose", capiche?

  • alexri

    #2 I think there's your problem

  • BaconBoy

    #1
    What? Girls fart?

    • Married Guy

      You're obviously not married.

      • tongystunter

        ah so true… i remember when i used to think that

      • http://twitter.com/StrongAsMeat @StrongAsMeat

        Took the words right out of my mouth.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

      Yea but it's wayyy more gross when they do

      • Larry

        If I'm dating a girl and she farts….. it's over.

        • JSPLSLS

          100% agree.

    • kanda

      she's going to light a rainbow on fire XD

  • alexri

    Is it just me, or #20 looks sexier than #33 ?

    • Guest

      It's just you

    • Chesty Laroo

      Lucy Mecklenburgh, most likely NSFW

      • Randy Marsh

        It's safe

    • houtini

      And yet they're both bitches!

      • Spank the Monkey

        Bitches like mud!

  • Jimmy

    #22

    Um. It's the front of a store. Awesome. Quality work, Chive.

    Next week – Pictures of the front of Target. Maybe we'll get Best Buy if we're lucky.

    • FionnR

      your idiocy is stunning…it's just beautiful 😀

      • Jimmy

        Yes, I'm an idiot because I think a picture of a national chain-store doesn't really belong in this post.

        Look it up, moron.

    • TheAndychrist

      It's the name of a song, I believe, though it was changed to "buy buy" instead of "bye bye".

      • Jimmy

        Yes, and it's a well-known, national chain of stores for baby stuff.

        So why is it in a post of "dirty time" pictures?

        • JSPLSLS

          this.

        • Chiefer

          It's called RANDOMNESS for a reason you moron!

        • Rick Mybaws

          never heard of it and thought it was funny to think of buying a child from a store….so fuck off.

        • Captain Obvious

          maybe because buybuy baby sounds like byebye baby… like you're getting rid of a baby… hmm… now this is a store, got a raging clue yet?

  • PunchFace

    #2 #33 Looks like a shitty day.

  • woolanoow

    Guys….#31, if it's a Photoshop, I think it's really cruel one.

    • woolanoow

      Why you minus me? It's true. Only a freak could do such a terrible thing!

    • tawhitlow

      What do you mean "if"

    • Ernie

      how does he poop?

      • Guest

        The other one vomits.

      • Spivias

        dude u read my mind

    • amony

      Went to school with that guy. He was pretty awesome and smart.

    • beardpapa

      I don't think its photoshop… you can tell it is real from the pixels.

      • Gabe

        Pixels wont show if it's a high resolution image (unless its a really crappy PS) and if the feathered it, so many ways to hide the PS.

    • http://twitter.com/ABQLifer @ABQLifer

      Human Centipede III: Twins

  • aaam,,,

    #6 extra room for my balls?

    • DooDooface

      So the next person doesn't sit in piss. Am i missing something?

      • Chesty Laroo

        no, but if you do then at least you won't hit the seat.

      • shaka

        code requires this on all commercial toilets, due to the fact that men might dribble on the seat, and then you would sit on it.

    • sarcasm

      if your balls go there, then do you piss on the floor?

    • BaconBoy

      http://www.themorningnews.org/article/take-your-s…

      Long article, but here's the explanation:

      …the “U” seat is preferred in public toilets because it is cheaper to produce, install, and clean.

    • lam

      i thought it was because if the sit fall while ur peeing standing up it wont break the stream

      • Kellen

        I thought that too, if you're peeing and the seat falls down, it'd be a disaster.

        Alternatively it allows you to forget to raise the seat, start peeing, and then when your girlfriend says "Did you lift the seat up?" you can say yes, raise it up while still peeing, and if she checks you're golden (golden was probably not the right word to use in this situation).

    • Birdhaus32

      More room for your hog when you have to poo. I posted it some where on here not too long ago.

    • roberto

      The real "why" is why do guys feel the need to raise it when it was OBVIOUSLY designed to be left alone? Dudes–from a fellow dude–quit being so active and just take a lazy piss.

      • Brad

        Because most dudes have shitty aim and end up pissing on the seat anyway. If you're too shy to piss in the urinal, then at least lift the seat. That way, those of us desperate enough to shit in a public restroom don't have to clean up a stranger's piss first.

    • acdc

      It's so the seat doesn't hit you in the neck while you are puking.

    • Ted_Stickles

      it's so you wiener doesn't rub against it while taking a crap. Lowers the spread of disease/parasites.

      • codvip

        My junk still hits the john. Just sayin'.

  • Married Guy

    #1 Hopefully fire can burn that nasty fish smell from your cooch!

  • twilight_boy

    FIRZT!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

    #23 This happened to me while driving through New Mexico… F*CK New Mexico

    • Zorro

      I'm glad u didn't leave ur nasty shit here, so thank u! Save ur sh*t for Texas
      NM f*ck yeah!

    • geez

      No Sir, F*ck You If you can't afford tissue paper.

  • Married Guy

    #20 Now that's a dirty downblouse! Boi-oi-oing!!

    • Chesty Laroo

      Lucy Mecklenburgh, a few NSFW google pics, most just NSFS (not safe for socks).

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      Dude did you just say blouse?

  • TheChipification

    #14
    I'm still laughing xD

    • Birdhaus32

      Oh so classy too. I think I might hang that up in my living room

  • http://www.facebook.com/sebastian.schwaighofer Sebastian Schwaighofer

    #28 i dont get this one

    • Slade Garrison

      Vaj is a nickname for the vagina. Hence, Vagina Butter.

      • http://www.facebook.com/sebastian.schwaighofer Sebastian Schwaighofer

        hahah.. okay thx 🙂

    • PunchFace

      I churned up some vaj butter last night! I churned up my girls snatch something fierce! It's so buttery.

      • Birdhaus32

        This just means he watched some POV porn and imagined it was himself

      • Logan

        she should probably go get that looked at. sounds kind of infectious

    • Boobman

      Not sure if trolling,
      or just dumb….

      • Ren

        Probably just doesn't speak English as a first language.

  • Ryan

    I don't think I can ever unsee #31

  • guest

    #7 If a lock is opened by many keys, It's a crappy lock. But if a key opens many locks then it's a master key

    • Chesty Laroo

      what if that lock is on the back door to the place, and there is no front door… is it gayer than twilight?

      • Robert Plant

        another twilight reference? the chivers are such a bunch of faggots.

    • NotPaula

      Did you even read the rest of that

    • Stevo

      Definitely need to read the post before posting old joke.

  • Dane

    #4 makes me #13

    • max

      #4 is the more disgusting thing ever….but i want moar from the blondie….find her!!

  • davey

    #30
    made me laugh. I thought of that when I saw the commercial the first time.

    • Biggus Diccus

      Wow didn't know that was really a commercial

  • Laurie

    #6 is a cost-cutting measure. My question about that pic is why is the flushing handle green??

    • K5MO

      i think that they leave that part out so peoples' genitalia don't rub against the seat.

      • http://www.thechive.com GreyGhost9

        i figured it was for those endowed males to keep from touching the water when sitting, that is how i use it.

    • Mike

      Actually, it is because the businesses who put in public restrooms know men won't lift the seat, so this keeps the seat… "cleaner." That is why you don't find seats like that in the women's bathroom.

      • dana

        Um, womens bathrooms totally have seats like that too, dude.

    • Mokuseitora

      Green Handle is antimicrobial covering, but I still think that the foot pedals are less dirty than the handles.

      • J.T.

        Nope. Green handle is a low flow toilet. Flush up for #1 and down for #2

    • Underbaker

      I thought it was a safety measure for guys, so if the seat accidentally falls while peeing you don't get your pee pee whacked.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=606371253 Shannon Coverdale

    #17 Pedobear approves

    • hMMMM

      you approve, grandpa creep

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=606371253 Shannon Coverdale

    Derp #19

    • Graham

      Man you are trying way too hard. I remember my first page

  • kng_nthn

    LOL @ #19

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