• garp

    …#1 – immobile tank silencer – 4.2 billion US

    • Dave

      Fuck that. We’re the US, we WANT them to know we’re around. That bastard is a NOISENER! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • Crapuccino

      1. that’s not a tank! that’s a german panzerhaubitze 2000 (artillery) with a silencer
      2. that’s no special camo, this is the standard camo of all tanks

  • TexWatson

    It’s an AV. Also you cannot silence that or any firearm. You can supress it which is what this is for, for training.
    But why the fuck is it camo?

    • garp

      ..Tex, Tex, Tex….(sigh) I’m three beers and two shots into Friday night and clearly do not know a fucking tank silencer from an AV, I was making up humour on the fly

      Major General Joseph Hooker————————————————–>

      • TexWatson

        Well the photo is a few years old and when it came out a lot of folks assumed if was a silencer
        And I was saying that is not a tank. (The thing with wheels) It’s artillery.
        Haha so suck it.

        And how do I know it can’t be silenced? Stick your head down the 155mm muzzle and see.

    • Hubble

      Um, sir…how do you know a tank can’t be silenced? Have you ever seen someone try really really hard to silence a tank? Cuz I don’t think you have.

      • HellHathNoFury

        Tanks do the silencing, with startling accuracy. And it’s camo so you can’t see it, obviously.

        • TexWaston

          Lol it’s not a tank.

    • fuzzybeard2016

      Tex, it’s woodland camo because some field manual says that all equipment that is outdoors is to be painted woodland camo; no further explanation offered.

      It boils down to this,

      There are 3 ways to do things:
      1) The Right Way.
      2) The Wrong Way.
      3) The (insert name of branch of service HERE) Way.

      • garp

        …ahem….according to my dog, it’s actually Wednesday night…(fuck I hate it when he corrects me)

        • CunningLinguist

          tex/fuzzybeard are both right. its an m109 paladin, which is artillery. all military vehicles are painted camoflauge for uniformity and functionality. tanks(in the general sense of the word) like the us main battle tank, the m1a1 abrams was designed to create a low profile in all aspects, to include noise reduction. the reach of the main gun on a tank is about 4 miles, so in a sense, youd be dead before you heard the sound of the round firing. so i guess you could say its silenced. but you wouldnt think that if you were in the tank. trust me, im a tanker.

          • thomas4som

            hint: looks like the chive owner actually responded to the above photo if you scroll down

            • Bart

              Man, that’s quite a big tank.

          • Crystal

            You guys are all such a bunch of nerds.

            I’m in excellent company ๐Ÿ˜€

            • top dog

              It’s a fricking Howitzer. Now shut up and go hump a few projo’s

          • Captain Obvious

            I am not in the military.

  • jojoaAA


  • Anonymous


  • Hubble

    O DAMN i want that truck so bad.

    You bet your life I’ll tune in, cuz it might be a free truck. It’s hard to imagine theChive getting any better than it already is, though.



    • RubberDogTurds

      the BIGGEST boobs, mebbe?

  • thomas4som

    I think the chive is launching a fleet of websites. They hinted at them in a radio interview I heard last week.

  • HellHathNoFury

    Be afraid. Be very afraid.

    • fuzzybeard2016

      I predict a shitstorm in the server room come the morning…

  • TexWatson

    I need more Jack Daniels

    • garp

      …you and me both…and more HHNF mid-drift dancing pics yup yup

      • HellHathNoFury

        Dancing? I’m a white Jew, I can’t dance. Okay, the Stanky Leg and the Tinkletarium Wiggle.

        • garp

          …well I’m a white presbyterian..get that ‘wiggle’ thing going…


            garp shut the fuck up you fucking cunt. your a stupid loser who sucks giraffe cock

            and hhnf your fat and dirty

      • verbal kint


        • ken

          He means ‘midriff’

          • HellHathNoFury

            My fat and dirty what? Guinea pig? Bunny? Mother-in-law? Boss? Moldy bacon?
            And he wanted to see my mid-drift. I’ve got a mad wicked clutch kick on my rear-wheel.

  • WraithEater

    Fat Chivers among us?

    • HellHathNoFury

      Dude, I’m right in the room.

      • Phideauxe

        Holy f’in shiz HHNF I’m sporting wood

  • LOL

    Having been here since it was an itty bitty site that didn’t have pop ups & wasn’t spam worthy in the comment section…hell…I don’t think we even had a comment section when I first found y’all…through the Top Posters debacle…Andrew & his nasty comments on Russian ladies…anyway…having been here since y’all were small…I just gotta say…Chive…I LOVE YOU!!! You keep me LOL’ing often. Thank you!!!! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • funtclaps

    they’re lying, my penis will not be appearing on the chive tomorrow

    • Stafferty

      You can’t be totally sure after those pictures of you and that cocker spaniel have been floating around the internet.

  • im lost!!!!

    months ago i send a photo of my penis,, you like it eh chive….!!!!

    • top dog

      Naw, it was too small. We couldn’t see it with a microscope.

  • Begna112

    Ok it just says tune in but not when… Darn now I’ll have to sit at my computer all day tomorrow clicking refresh until it happens. (note: nothing irregular there)

  • John

    Hey all,

    Thanks for the interest. We’re going to start rolling out our empire tomorrow. I’m really excited about all this and we think you’re going to like it.

    (takes owner hat off)

    Leave HHNF alone, she’s a white Jew with a stank leg, life is hard enough.

    Yup, LOL has been here since we opened. We love you too

    I have no idea what that monstrosity is in the first photo there but I think it fired a horse into space once.

    • idpr

      wow, i see our chive overlord has joined us in the comments

      • Bob

        John you got it wrong, it wasn’t horse they launched. They fired Raspberry Jam at southern California. And I think I know who did it. Only one would DARE give us the raspberry…..LONESTAR!!!!

    • LOL

      John…great to see you & your large rainbow in the comments. ๐Ÿ˜‰ It’s tomorrow where I am…have you laid the empire yet? And how many times did you lay it? ๐Ÿ™‚ Will we have pictorial proof like your Vegas shin dig?? ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜€ Hmmm?

  • somethings

    That third website that they used to have in the top left corner with a “coming soon” caption is coming out tomorrow, I’m guessing. What was it called? The Big Pic? Maybe that’s why they’ve been introducing the HQ pictures…they were betas?


    p.s, along with the fact that garp is clearly into beastiality, i would like to point out that when they say they are unvailing something BIG, given the fact that i would not allow them to post pictures of my enormous wang, it is highly like that they are going to open their new site “THE BIG PIC” which used to be visable at the top of the page saying “coming soon”
    also hinted to by the fact that John makes mention to rolling out their empire

    just a little bit of insight there for yalllllllll

    again, garp enjoys goat play

  • sdfeds

    Match Riches.C/O/M

    a private exclusive dating club to meet millionaires, rich and beautiful men and women worldwide.

    Our members include CEOs, professional athletes, doctors, lawyers, investors, entrepreneurs, professional models and super singers, and Hollywood celebrities, just to name a few.

    Everyone is welcome here. You don’t have to be wealthy or famous.

  • Huh

    Thats one hell of a dick…

  • Stafferty

    Bob is pregnant, isn’t he? Congratulations!

  • The dude

    Am I the only one who thinks the tank thing kind of looks like something else?

  • general john cabot trail

    its got a gun by its got tracks by and she shoots stuff big stuff we calls dat a tank eh down with the causeway

  • the cape breton liberation army

    we needs some of dem eh if we gonna shut down the causeway happy Canada day you hippie americans

  • McBeastie

    Is Chive finally getting spellcheck?

  • thetech2

    you sir obviously have no appreciation for cape breton lingo you must be an american hmmm

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