Daily Afternoon Randomness (47 Photos)

  • Brother Maynard

    #47 Thanks Chive!

    • Scatman

      The things I'd eat out of her butt..

    • jed

      why is the chive so good? http://www.oneadayporno.com

      • The World

        Please go away forever.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steve-Shaw/669440656 Steve Shaw

        You really didn't learn last time did you? This loser posts his home address and real name on the whois record for this stupid website.

    • http://thechive.com/ BobbaFett

      Thanks Chivette, I was having a rough day too.

      I reckon you've helped thousands feel better today, bad day or not.

    • Skid

      I propose.. marriage

    • Tone

      State obvious, get thumbs up.

  • fRANK


  • God

    I don't exist.

    • lonin

      Neither do I

      • God

        Indeed, my son.

    • whocares

      What does that have to do with anything?

      • Name

        Nothing… it's daily afternoon randomness. Clearly, you're missing the point.

        • God

          I forgive him.

          • Real God

            Dude, stop trying to be me.

          • Dionicio Orozco

            NOW FORGIVE ME…and answer my prayer while your at it…I still want that damn laptop

            • God

              Not now, chief, I'm in the fucking zone!

            • Yahweh


            • Jehovah

              no worries brah, i gotchu.

              • Lucifer


    • DaddyD

      But we have invented you anyway.

      • God

        I live inside your imagination, with Santa Claus, free beer and pillow fights at sorority houses.

        • dub

          Free beer actually happens sometimes, though.

          • God

            As does free herpes. You must choose your battles wisely, my son.

    • its_forge

      Sure you do bro, you just gotta believe in yourself.

      • God

        Thanks bro. Pound it out.

    • GoForth

      Postito ergo sum.

      • God

        I don't speak Spanish.

        • facepalm

          that's latin dumbass, he meant to say something like "I post, therefore I am"

          • God

            That's a joke, dumbass. Godfacepalm.

            • dub

              That explains the tremors.

    • Herm23

      If you don't exist, then how are you posting comments? You exist and you cant convince me otherwise.

      • God

        I am a paradox.

        • sabbath

          You're a Loony

          • Johnny

            Black Night FTW

    • BaJezzus

      But the Babel fish proves you exist. (You may now poof away in a cloud of logic)

      • Ian

        I was just thinking 'YES! No one posted a Hitchhikers Guide Reference!' and the last comment was you. Ninja'd

  • zdrake13

    #47 thank you!

    • ABuck


    • Eight

      Spank you very much!

    • Tone

      Stat obvious, get thumbs up.

  • http://www.facebook.com/rjpark720 Richard Park

    DAR you've been early lately…LOVING IT!!!

    • MScott

      That's what she said.

  • tommy jane

    #15 The Chive: Putting the world in proper perspective since 2008

    • Gevth

      I object #15. If that think wasn't invented, nothing would be covering her. Unless you're talking about women, in which case I'd like to apologize and withdraw my objection. And point out that it's a huge coincidence that the bikini in that girl looks like those fruit stripes.

    • Booooger

      Yeah, it starts out strong, but the flavor goes away so fast………… Oh yeah, the gum sucks too.

      • Pundit

        At first, I thought you were talking about boogers.

        • Him

          Boogers and snot,
          I like them a lot.

    • Allen

      MOAR of this fine woman

  • DARski

    Cool story bros!


    You can beat your meat. You can beat your wife. But you can't beat a good DAR.

    • josh

      dumb…..but surprisingly unoriginal!!

      • Guesty

        Much like most every comment on this site. Not yours, but most…

        • Ben Durr

          Better than "Posted that bitch a comment. Bitches love comments."

    • FlyingSpagMonst

      Domestic violence is funny

      • Ike Turner


        • Guy that hit Rihanna

          I can't remember my name.

          • Adam Heffelfinger

            Chris Brown

    • heywoodjablowme

      Don't tell me what I can and can't beat.

  • Carlos


    • GRyde

      Doncha think it's about time to quit that crap and say something worthwhile?

      • Tex

        Darn tootin', straight shooter!

    • shaunvw

      FAIL…not even close

    • H. D. Durp

      Plain and simply fucking retarded.

  • Robby

    #34 – What Patty will turn into. Skinny but depressed.

    • drunkguy

      Stella in a can? Rad.

  • pdiddily420

    Won-DAR-ful way to end a Hump Day!!

    #30 #43 #47

  • Gally

    #43 Your wife is GORGEOUS!

  • Gwintro

    #30 Hump day on 4/20= fucking magically delicious

    • Mmmmkkkaaaayyyyyyy

      Drugs are bad, mmmmmkaaaay?

    • sheoncebelieved

      I want to bury my face in that hump

      • Bill C

        I haven't been this turned on by words on a page since I read the Ken Starr report.

        • Hil

          God damn it Bill, I thought I told you…. NO CHIVING!

          • Chelsea

            Mom, don't talk to dad that way! He's an important man!

            • Rodger

              Damn right. I love my big brother.

              • Monica

                He's got great tastes in cigars.

                • Marc Mezvinsky

                  Why the fuck did I marry that ugly bitch? Feminist cunt just like her mom. Fuck my life. But my father-in-law is cool. He plays the sax, which I really like.

                  • Ghost of Buddy

                    I got hit by a fucking car, Bill, while you were too busy fapping it to Sexy Chivers. Have you no shame??

                  • Socks

                    If you want the truth, sometimes he would pet me in strange places. That made me pretty uncomfortable. I always forgave him though, because it was only at times right after he and Al had smoked crack for hours on end. I didn't give a fuck for his policies, but he sure knew how to crush some prime snatch. He also fed me twice a day, so I guess all-in-all he was an alright guy (for someone from Arkansas).

                    • Al "The Veep" Gore

                      That is fucking hilarious, Socks…. I am soooo high right now. Is it hot in here or is it just GLOBAL WARMING? You're welcome for the internet, by the way.

                    • Tipper

                      Your constant drug use is one of the many reasons we're divorced. That, and you're stiff everywhere except where it counts.

                    • Karenna Gore Schiff

                      Mom, now don't you start up too. But, in all honesty, dad is a bit of a douche.

                    • Albert, Jr.

                      Hey Buddy, you think you had it bad. My dad let me get hit by a car too. I was thrown 30 feet into the air. My dad's an asshole!

                    • Gee Dubs

                      Hey y'all, I won the lotto to be president! Go Texas.

                    • Laura

                      Darn it, Georgie, I told you not to go talkin' on them internets, daaang! You might could run into some pictures of Jenna what you might not like to see, bless her heart.

                    • titties


    • Tim

      It's fake you fucking idiots.

  • Allen

    I wanna talk to Sampson, fly me to the moon

    • http://www.facebook.com/ilya.josefson Ilya Josefson

      'Cause it's hard being black and gifted!
      Sometimes I wanna throw it all down and get lifted!

  • thegrinningcrow

    #46 has balls of steel

  • Paula

    I have decided to quit the Chive forever today. So long!

    The one who is gone forever.

    • Ronnie


    • F*** OFF PAULA!!!

      no please don't….we'll miss you

    • Roscoe

      Not the real Paula. Punked….

    • A_Buck

      Why do that to yourself?

      • trololiver

        probably 'cause the chivers suck their mothers' cocks.

    • switch_24

      now this would be one of the best DAR ever if Paula reaaally stops posting.. such an annoying troll

    • CE25

      So longgggg gay boyss

    • Paula_

      Nice try, but The Chive is Hotel California. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.

      – the one you love to hate

      • JohnQ

        fuck yeah Paula!

    • theederv

      Shame this is a fake, fuck you fake paula, i got excited for a minute there

    • CHris

      I wish I had your strength

  • Alec

    #29 Yes it is!

    • Humping Day

      State obvious, get thumbs up?

  • disturbed

    #4 Well there's your problem right there.

    • dev

      yea he got pulled over for that

  • Bob


    That's just creepy.

  • Sam

    #15 WOW

    • bull1123

      take that FruitStripe!

      • UGH I hate gum


    • Hump day survivor

      O South Padre Island

  • Sir Mix A Lot

    My anaconda don't want none, unless you got buns, hun.

  • TheTruth

    I refreshed and there was Randomness, now I'm happy.

    • less

      you must have a very sad life…

  • mileses

    #25 those things are what is causing all this violent weather.. throwing the earth off axis.

    • rdh014

      Ahh…what heaven to wake up with…

    • COCO

      she looks fat. she should lose about 50 pounds.

  • Brother Maynard

    #45 Ellen Page is a babe, anyone who says differently can suck it!

    • Chive in the Killam

      I think she's cute, but it's shocking how short she is. It blew my mind the first time I saw her. I work at a grocery store in Halifax and I've bumped into her on several occasions. Is she cute? Yes. Do i see more attractive university students walk in there on a regular basis? Yes.

    • rdh014

      Mmm…completely disagree BM…cute, maybe. Babe material? Let's check back in about 10 years or so…

      • its_forge

        When she's 34? Well I guess. Once a woman's 24 years old there's not going to be a lot of changing of the figure going on. Unless she gets pregnant and afterwards gets a little bit more hip and a slightly heavier bosom and a little pooky tummy… I'll be in my bunk

      • Brother Maynard

        I'm going to go back on my statement and not request you suck it, but I just think she is so damn cute it almost hurts. And I don't care if she is short. There are many many hot short women.

        I think she will be very attractive into her 50's.

    • (^_^)

      I would point out she is wearing a mask in this picture.

      • Jessica Condrey

        I was just about to say that;p haha
        Gosh, you men and how you like women that look like little boys….weirdos

        • COCO

          "you men and how you like women that look like little boys"

          THANK YOU(and they say they like "real/average women", lolololololololololololol!

    • andrew

      I think she is attractive, but this picture does not prove that point by any means

  • crapflinger

    #36 …it's technically sloughing not bleeding. not to say that periods don't probably suck, but it's not like there's actually an open wound with fresh arterial blood coming out of it. women aren't losing anything that was serving them any benefit at the time anyway. so, man up and quit your bitchin

    • Justin Hall

      I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.

    • jayman

      It's still 8+ FUCKING YEARS!

    • guuurll

      thank you! i think men are more scared and upset about periods than women are!

      • grrrrrrl

        they also seem to think about mens' penis sizes more than women do…….

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