Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • Tim

    #22 The burbs! Fantastic movie

    • Randy Marsh

      Unbelievably underrated.

    • jamesaholic

      "There go the goddamn brownies!"

      • bigdeal

        here kid, somethin for the old sweet tooth.

    • tk421

      Just watched it yesterday! "My wife's home!!??!"

    • Ian

      Too bad it's not the sixth today. Two days late, Chive.

  • krista

    #3 is an awesome bike

    • Nate

      Krista?? is that really you?

      • krista

        wrong krista i dont know a nate

  • davey

    #9
    I would do her like that and then eat her cake.

    • Headfade

      holy crap my parliament just exploded!

      • ilovethechive

        Good One Sir

    • #387

      — T — is for Tittaes!!!

    • HUMONGO

      Mmmmmmmmmmmm, pie and then cake….

    • kev

      i would do her cake and then eat her like that

    • OwnerOfYou

      What cake?! What are you guys talking about?! I don't see any cake at all…

      • Ohhhh

        Cause of the girl and her boobs…cause your looking at them so much, they make you not notice the cake! OMG thats hilarious, I get it now.

    • Anonyboobs

      We are Anonyboobs. Expect us…. with a boner.

    • scancab

      i'd eat her pie, do her and then eat her cake

    • David

      What kind of boobs is that, cake……. What kind of cake is that, boobs……. I mean can i have a piece of cake.

  • Cyberfunker

    #3 Is a badass ride…I want one.

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

    #18 one day trip = three suitcases.

    • Ryan

      I see you shwartz is as big as mine!

      • Ryan

        your

  • http://www.facebook.com/bmignaco Bruno Mignaco

    hi! is 330am here.. CHIVE ON!

    • Catbra

      5pm Friday afternoon here already. It's great to be in one of the first countries to get to the weekend first (although most of you bitches are still asleep when we go to work Monday…)

      • https://twitter.com/NavjeetBajwa n_kb

        12:50 am in Vancouver, B.C!!

        • lolz yer a dick

          Lol CatBra Has already begun to party!!!!! NOOOOO!!! Bastard. lol. Its 102am here and I'm hanging with of #1 's cousin and a 12 of his mmexican friends right now. Mmmmm…Johnny Black you make me so gay…… (I pray corona is a chick….my mouth tastes salty.)

        • DCMOFO

          2:00am Friday morning in Denver. Catbra, let's talk Sunday at 6pm my time when you're at work 9am Monday morning. (It's great to be one of the last countries to end the weekend).

          • Catbra

            Ppffttttttt, I'll remember that when the alarm goes off on Monday morning. Right now, I'm ordering Friday night pizza and hitting the drive-through for some booze.

            Enjoy your day at work on Friday 🙂

            • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

              Drive through for booze!?!

            • http://www.facebook.com/bmignaco Bruno Mignaco

              hahaaha! right on!
              Have a blasting weekend!

  • Jack

    "Walter. I know you're in there. That scum-sucking, barking rat of yours has just taken his last dump on my lawn. I find one more- just one- and I'm gonna catch him and staple his ass shut. " #22

    • lolz yer a dick

      wow man youre a fucking champ for pulling that. A true videophile.

    • nolanz

      what movie is this from?

  • James

    #20 annoyingly true. cat saturday is funny. but cats dont come close to dogs!

    • 90sgamer

      Cats don't come close to dogs … in killing people.

      So: Not annoyingly true, but perfectly understandable.

      • Paul

        Cats suck

    • crazydog

      This is true because cat people are ultimate freak losers

    • McBeastie

      Dog attacks person: two week recovery in ICU
      Cat attacks person: "honey, where's the neosporin?"

      • http://twitter.com/soy_LG @soy_LG

        That's a bit more like it! I've never heard of a domestic cat scratching a man's jugular to death…but I could be mistaken. I am under the pussy power, not gonna' lie. haha

        • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

          My GF spent a week in hospital after a nasty cat scratch/bite.Major infection!

          • McBeastie

            See, shoulda got that neosporin on it.

    • mikeofla

      You never hear this on the news "Pack of wild house cats attack and kill a man and severily injure his wife. Are the streets safe? More At 11! "

    • So Wrong

      As someone who's been attacked by both cats, and dogs, I have to tell you that neither likes being cooked, but they taste about the same.

      • andy

        i hope you cat lovin a-holes gets scratched after your cat stamps its piss shit all in your skin

        • umadbro

          umad?

        • McBeastie

          So why are you telling So Wrong? He just said he cooks cats. I think even a dog could have figured out who to reply to.

    • Da Sandman

      that's because dogs can kill people… cats can't… idiots

      • FreakyBobo

        No, what people realise is that even if a dog has a minor attack they get put down, thats the BS thing. If my dog ever bit someone on defence of our property and someone complained, and he had to be put down, i would be hiring an assassin.

  • MAR

    #1 Real Genius

    • Dazilla

      i now need one for my house.

      • sober

        Hell, I need one for work

        • RiverDogs

          I have a cooler at work – and a stocked bar. I will be watching the water level today!

          • Kosplay_Kory

            then you know what you must do

  • dash

    #9 i'd like to eat some of her v for vagina

    • phil

      Doubt that is actually what the mask it trying to reference my friend.

      • Trent

        Who enjoys a good story about a bridge?

        • TylerV

          Well played Trent.

  • keepontruckinit

    #1 Yes please!

  • xen

    #5 looks like Keanu Reeves

    • shark

      don't know if troll or just stupid….

      • DaddyD

        Stupid troll

    • Matt

      Nothing gets by you, does it?

    • Gareth

      Woah!! You're like…so….right.

    • BAMFinater

      Be exelent to each other

  • shark

    You sly bastards….

  • Megalock26

    #9 FLBP for….well you should know the rest.

  • MovieMaker13

    The mask is a great touch. Not like anyone is going to be looking at her face anyways. #9

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

      She's wearing a mask?!?! I have bad news for you…

      • b-ry

        his dick tasted like shit?

  • http://bella-d.tumblr.com Bella

    #18 is my life. My bag has everything anyone would need!

    • TylerV

      But all a guy needs is not in your bag… *wink* *wink*

  • anon

    #11 "I'm a golden god!" for the new age.

    • ant

      AAWWWWWWWW YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!

  • Dagoth Wit

    #17 That little girl is going to grow up to be awesome.

    • Matt

      She already is!

      • Pedo Man

        Agreed. I'd tongue punch her fart-box!

        • Fred

          Which is why she has a gun.

          • xisy

            part of me is thinking the picture is a fake.. lots of bullets, but no muzzle flash? :S

            • McBeastie

              short bursts…she's stopped shooting, but bullets shells still in air…pretty explainable.

              • Dr3xell

                No actually it's not, the muzzle blast would easily last just as long as the shell staying in the air and you would see a distortion in front of the gun where the bullets pass through the air at high velocity. The photo is clearly shopped………….

    • MrAliasMan

      Cousin to Hit-Girl.

    • Penrath

      I love 'Merica! She may be Governor of Alaska some day! …or Jersey… 😀

    • panama99

      I like the "Peace" symbols on the jacket.

      Concerning the muzzle flashes….you are watching too many movies.

    • Vagina Jones

      It's like a real life Banksy painting. Irony jacket and everything.

    • Maytrix

      Unless she can't handle the kick back and ends up killing herself like some kid did last year.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Rob.Barreiro Roberto Barreiro

    #16 Been there!

    • Tony

      I think people prefer that over no messages all day.

    • http://twitter.com/pacopereap @pacopereap

      i closed my FB profile a few days before my bday. it was a sad bday. nobody remember bdays anymore.

    • It's my day of birth

      It's my b-day, this is me today!!!!!!!!

  • Seldi84

    #9 Nice *ahem* cakes.

    • Irishstephen

      I see what you dd there!! Oops!! Did I say DD?? I meant to say DID!! My mistake!

  • notachiver

    #15 Is definitely a Chiver ,pathetic ,alone and psychotic.

    P.S- Having an opinion is not trolling ,get creative fanboys.

    • Dan

      That's Bjarne Stroustrup, dumbass.

      • duke nukem

        Only nerds know other nerds.

        • Just Sayin'

          That makes me feel better, since i have no idea who that is…

          • Dan

            If you've played a video game in the last 20 years, thank him.

    • Robert Plant

      he can't be a chiver. he's not fat and ugly enough.

    • ImpressMe

      No….but continually coming to a website that you profess to dislike…and making childish, snarky comments does indeed qualify you as a troll. Not a particularly bright one either.

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #6 tweety and sylvester all over again. classic

  • snoobs89

    #9 dem boobs!

    • Maaan hold up!!

      BEWBIES!!

    • Irishstephen

      Somehow, I wish this was a GIF…

  • Ryan

    #14 I guess every whore has a price.

    • toby

      Yes ,and the chivettes are the cheapest.

      • headshaker

        uh huh…Chivettes who will never date you are whores…uh huh, uh huh…

        • Fasteddy14

          No he probably thinks Chivettes who will never date him are lesbian whores… LOL!!!

      • b-ry

        agreed. bunch of skank-ass attention whoring douchebagettes.

        • Smarterthanyou

          I agree as well. Shanks!

    • Fasteddy14

      I believe they are a couple like I believe Shia and Megan Fox…

    • Ian

      Anne Hathaway is not a whore! You shut your goddamn mouth!

    • Bree1912

      She is posing with Valentino…the designer of the dress she is wearing in this picture. Nice try though.

      • Dagoth Wit

        Exactly. I think the Not Awesome part is referring to his "tan".

  • Maaan hold up!!

    #9 Find her Chive (without the mask) and post MOAR!!!

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