Hipsters: a special kind of douche (36 Photos)

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  • Derp

    Yeah, right up there with Chiver douche.

    • MikeOlmos

      DIE!

      • TITO

        SLOWLY!

    • Derp

      I would tell both of you to go date-rape a sorority girl, but you are Chivers so you were going to do that this weekend anyway.

      • Crod

        win.

      • TITO

        Actually I'm going to a metal fest at the beach. Plenty of girls there. And beer. And rock music!

    • http://www.facebook.com/evelyn.ponce Evelyn Ponce Quintero

      then why the fuck are you here?

      • Derp

        Sociological study of Doucheography. Why else would I be visiting this shithole?

      • Derp

        Actually, I started coming here because I like looking at stupid stuff on the internet…but then I came to realize that all that is ever posted here is recycled content and self-promoting bullshit.

        • Herp

          I could take the time to reply, but Max already did the better job of it.
          "ADMIT IT! Despite your pseudo-bohemian appearance and vaguely leftist doctrine of beliefs, you know nothing ABOUT art or sex that you couldn't read in any trendy new york underground fashion magazine…Proto-typical non-conformist. You are a vacuous soldier of the thrift store gestapo. You adhere to a set of standards and tastes that appear to be determined by an unseen panel of hipster judges, giving your thumbs up and thumbs down to incoming and outgoing trends and styles of music and art. Go analog baby, you're so post-modern. You're diving face forward into an antiquated past, it's disgusting! It's offensive! Don't stick your nose up at me!

          You spend your time sitting in circles with your friends, pontificating to each other, forever competing for that one moment of self aggrandizing glory in which you hog the intellectual spotlight, holding dominion over the entire shallow, pointless conversation. Oh we're not worthy.

          When you walk by a group of quote-unquote normal people you chuckle to yourself, patting yourself on the back as you scoff. It's the same superiority complex shared by the high school jocks who made your life a living hell, makes you a slave to the competitive capitalist dogma you spend every moment of your waking life bitching about! "

          • Derp

            TLDR

          • http://reamers.org/clowns.htm Handjob Murphy

            God-diggity-dammit, but bravo! Outstanding rant, or shall I just say, "Rant-standing."

            No, that sucks, I'll stay with "outstanding rant."

    • Red

      yep. except hipsters aren't nearly obnoxious enough to come up with their own catch-phrase.

  • br0ken

    i see nothing wrong with 24

    • http://www.facebook.com/codealpha Terry Burke

      #24

      • black27696

        Thanks. There was no way I was scrolling back up to see what he was talking about.

        No seriously. Not being sarcastic. I really wasn't going to scroll back up, and I thank you for your service.

    • onethirdjewman

      exactly what i was going to say

    • Guibombe

      You liking it!

    • thepoopsmith

      I liked it before it was posted…

    • Tops31

      The Hipster in the photo is the photographer. It was obviously taken with a "hip" vintage camera, like the one seen in pic 34, and with so much hipness that the operator couldn't be bothered to angle up a little more to include the subject's heads.

      • spanky

        the camera is in pic 32, dumb ass

  • http://man-lair.com Stafferty

    #11 I knew it. Hitler was an art school hipster

    • Meh...

      But he killed millions of jews…not so hip….

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

        I'm gonna get flamed for this one but… He sent people to camps before it was cool

    • expresso

      could girls tell me what they find attractive in these Dbags ?
      cauze they're always getting the hot girls…

      • b-ry

        i could ask the same about the chivers, but they would have to get girls first.

    • b.o.l

      actually, he was rejected from art school

  • lowdown

    #18 #19 I would love to party with these girls. They may be "hipsters" but they are also hot, and probably know how to have a good time!

    • MLDM

      I didn't realize hipsters were so into Indians…

      • http://bella-d.tumblr.com Bella

        It's a weird trend now, Native American and Tribal influence.
        It's even more popular in places like France and Spain. When I saw all the Native American stuff in Spain, I said, "It's weird, they acknowledge the Native Americans more than the actual Americans do."

    • http://www.last.fm/user/mutiilator Brand_n

      You say that now, but wait until you actually try to start up a conversation with them and realize how vapid and obnoxious they really are.

      • Ned Flanders

        Starting a conversation? There's your first mistake.

        • http://www.last.fm/user/mutiilator Brand_n

          So you can sleep with a girl without exchanging a single word? I'm impr-iddidly-diddily-essed.

  • Intensemasterdebater

    #15 Or Both

    • Shane

      I was thinking this when i saw it. Lolz.

    • lolol

      but still, not as gay as twilight… close tho

    • hogizzle

      Or one in the same. Is there such a thing as a "straight" hipster?

    • Fry

      I'd rather be gay than be a hipster.

    • Spivias

      o.o
      how is it both
      i dont even see the difference

    • GreyGhost9

      o.0 fry face

    • J-Bird

      Hipsters would never be gay, it's too mainstream

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=606371253 Shannon Coverdale

    Ha ha, hipsters suck!

  • cheez it

    The oversized glasses really piss me off

  • http://twitter.com/#!/gfeinberg86 GreyGhost9

    KILL IT WITH FIRE!!

    • Derp

      You certainly aren't killing it with original, witty comments, that's for sure.

      • GreyGhost9

        O I'm sorry did i ruin your viewing experience? Maybe if i had thought up an original and witty name like Derp i could have come of something better to write. You sir have bested me i bow to your genius o.0

  • Kaars

    #7, it's not ironic, you just look like a retard.

    • rega

      Borat?

    • Gutterville

      Lucky there aren't many hipsters in london but if there were I think I would be on the news for hipster beating

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=562743466 Stefan Laws

      I'm choosing to believe that he's on his way to a "dress like a hipster" party, cause he's kinda hot.

  • metalcool36

    #7….. C'mon now, we get it…. STOP IT ALREADY!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

    This is what's wrong with America. Not Republicans, not Democrats, Not Obama… just hispsters…

    • duh

      disagree. everything's wrong in the US. hipsters are the LEAST of your worries.

      maybe the US should concentrate more on pressing issues…and leave these people alone?

      • http://www.facebook.com/christopher.neufeldt Christopher Neufeldt

        No, we need to shoot hiptsers.

      • onethirdjewman

        hm. joke-comprehension fail.

      • pfunk

        yes, we should leave them alone. attention is what they want…we can't give in

    • chivette girl

      Nope Obama is a bigger problem

      • That Guy

        who do you think votes for Obama? hipsters. ergo ~ hipsters are worse.

      • Penis

        Good thing you're not a "chivette dude".

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1521060132 Sterling Crawford

      Thanks for giving people on the internet an excuse to turn something into a political debate about the United States' situation.

      When is the racist comment coming?

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

        You're a redneck. Close enough for you?

      • Derp

        Some dude from Oklahoma named Benton just called you a redneck. There is more irony in that than even these hipsters know what to do with.

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

          Born and raised in Southern California, I go to school in Oklahoma. Knowing the facts fail.

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

          Also, the dude lives in Texas.

          • Derp

            Yeah, Texas does suck…

            • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1521060132 Sterling Crawford

              Thanks for the stalk you two.

              • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

                Not my fault your privacy settings suck.

                • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1521060132 Sterling Crawford

                  And it's not your fault you're curious about strange men. It's ok, you're not the first I've had this affect on.

                  • James Westfall

                    boom.

                  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

                    I meant the redneck bit as a joke, but if calling me gay is your fallback… clearly it struck too close to home.

                    • dubs

                      Sterling, Benton………you are both gay rednecks with retarded names so STFU………thanks

            • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000681927439 Kyle Shubert

              Texas does NOT suck, good sir!

              • TexasBlowsMe

                That's right, it BLOWS!

  • shallow

    who cares…people have their own style. let them be. no one calls you douche bags for wearing Chive On t-shirts do they? welcome to the now. people are different.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

      Obviously, you're new here. Chive On t-shirts are more rare than a virgin in LA.

      • shallow

        not new by any means….been on this site for a year steady now. i just think its funny how everyone bashes people that are different cause…well the Chive knows what's right….right?

        but i hate Chive T-shirts. and if i saw someone wearing one…i wouldn't say "Chive On"

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

          Obviously your name is suiting. Do you enjoy kicking puppies as well?

          • Tobbers

            win!

          • shallow

            nah…just cats.

            all I'm saying is who the fuck cares how people dress or act? everyone's different.
            accept it and move on….

            • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

              They dress differently because usually their personalities are so shallow *wink* that they have nothing about them that makes them unique. When in reality, most people would be happy to sit and talk with you if you weren't trying to hard to draw attention to yourself.

              My advice is… instead of wearing glasses with no lenses and drinking PBR, maybe they should do some community service instead?

              • OwnerOfYou

                here here! i've never seen a hipster at a soup kitchen, or charity drive. only see them at farmer's markets and 2 for 1 PBR special havin dive bars with live ukelele music.

                • ManMythLegend

                  What's wrong with PBR 2 for 1 sales? It's cheap and it's nowhere near as piss pour tasting as Keystone or Natural Light/Ice. PBR will always have a place in my fridge.

                  • jakubwrobel

                    PBR is still as disgusting as Keystone or the other piss beers.

            • red

              Perhaps a fresh tampon and some Midol will allow you to get over this.

        • panama99

          Shallow, did we see your picture in this group? Is that why you're upset…..come here…give me a hug.

          Feel better.

          Now, STFU and love the T Shirts

          • shallow

            the t-shirts fuckin suck dude. it's a website….

            i might as well sport a Google T-shirt.

          • loser

            let me guess. your one of those people that hits refresh every second at 9am PST to get 1 of every Chive T-shirt when they arrive.

            get. a. life.

        • RayBoogs

          It's not because they're different, it's because they do it to be "cool" or to not "conform", when in reality they do the same dam things we all do, but they just look like fools when they do it.

          • shallow

            so who defines cool? Chive T shirts to me….are LAME.

            and no i'm not a hipster….but i don't give a fuck how or what they call 'style'

            you can say the same thing as black dudes with baggy clothes but it would be racist; when in fact….its THEIR style.

            • RayBoogs

              So your telling us to stop calling people lame for dressing like hipsters, when you, in your own words have just called chive t-shirts lame and said they suck, I believe you are a hypocrite, and quite possibly a massive idiot.

              • shallow

                their not MY thing….doesn't mean i call all you people who own one douche bags. i know….your confused. i personally wouldn't wear one….and i think their dumb.

                same with these people. their different…but who cares? i don't go around calling them douche bags.

                get it now ray ray?

                • Derp

                  Both of you need a remedial grammar lesson.

                  • jackie_d_1989

                    It really annoys me when people use the wrong form of "there/their/they're" !

                • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1521060132 Sterling Crawford

                  I call people douches when I see them wearing a Chive shirt. Not because I think they are actually a bad person, but because I'm jealous they have one.

                  Kind of like how your mother left you in front of the microwave too often. Oh wait, that has nothing to do it with it, but imagine it in a grainy, sepia filter manner, and this in ▲.

            • Simon

              Cool is defined by means of a communal agreement, so no body defines it, we all do. Cool is what the majority would consider it. Just like fashion.

              Adopting a way of dress/hair/make up/even living just to a certain fringe group just to be 'out of the mainstream' is retarded.
              People who do that haven't found their sense of identity so they feel the need to be part of something larger. Be it hipsters, emos, metalheads.

              When you want to rebel and be 'different' joining another group of 'not mainstream' people, you eventually become mainstream as well. you encounter yourself in a paradox. That's what wrong with this so-called 'style'.

              It's way different to just sporting your favourite team's jersey or your favourite's website T-shirt.

              • Derp

                "People who do that haven't found their sense of identity so they feel the need to be part of something larger.

                […]

                It's way different to just sporting your favourite team's jersey or your favourite's website T-shirt."

                No. No, it's not.

                • iloveQuatchi

                  Yeah it is

        • benbobbins

          You rebel.

      • ChocolateBear

        not where I'm at, I've seen at least 7 today between the navy and green…they're pretty lame, like the site, not the shirt

    • Derp

      Wrong. I totally call people douches for wearing Chive On t-shirts.

    • Halfasandwich

      I don't give a shit either, but I find things like this to sort of a fascinating social experiment….people say that hipsters are trying to be "cool" and that what makes them lame….so what does that make people who feel the need to make fun of them to feel "cooler" than everyone else? Endless, needless circle if you ask me….we're all assholes to some small extent, and there's no disputing that

      • shallow

        people say that hipsters are trying to be "cool" and that what makes them lame….so what does that make people who feel the need to make fun of them to feel "cooler" than everyone else?

        exactly my point.

        • RDM

          didn't you just throw some mad hate on everyone wearing a Chive On shirt… are you doing that to make yourself feel cooler? Or are you too cool than the cooler people who make fun of the "cool" people… this is more confusing than the triangle thing.

    • onethirdjewman

      chive shirts are cool because they let other possible chivers around you know that you're part of the same online community. it's kind of like if you're from Colorado, and you're visiting a foreign country and stumble across someone else from Colorado. you'd be like, "oh shit, what's up?" it's a sense of community.

      dressing like a hipster isn't about community, it's about dressing crazy enough to grab attention

      • Derp

        A sense of community? Seriously? A "community" of people who visit the same website that does nothing but post pg-13 stuff that it stole from reddit and 4chan?

        Really? Are you serious? A "community"?

        Is this what has become of the world?

        • Jen

          BOOBIES

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

            Effective way to end any argument regardless of the situation.

            • jackie_d_1989

              This argument is giving me anxiety just reading it! can't we all just get along? come on! stay calm and chive on =]

          • panama99

            Thank you….well put.

            I'll take two, please.

        • onethirdjewman

          jeez, i hope i didn't give you too much of a stroke.

          have 4chan or reddit contributed thousands of dollars in donations to a little volunteer fire-department in the middle of nowhere? have they contributed thousands of dollars to a little girl with a rare disorder? do they instantly sell out of the tee-shirts they put up for sale? do they host get-together parties? have they given the world the wonderful gift of the sexy chivettes?

          yes, it's a community, where users–for the most part–enjoy a shared sense of humor and recognition of awesomeness and/or sexiness.

          • yup

            God Damn you're a fucking loser

            • TRON

              agreed.

    • j22

      I agree with you. U talk like a libertarian.

      • Derp

        And you type like a libertarian–overly simple with no fucking idea what they are talking about.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=786440649 Chris Arabian

      Welcome to the NOW? Fucking hipster with your wanna be hippie talk.

    • engarde

      You obviously have never met a hipster before if you think it's just style. Think about #3 for example. He's only using that typewriter because he heard somewhere that there are no more typewriter companies. Who the fuck uses typewriters anymore?!?!

    • Fucking Steve.

      Leave pabst out of this. If you need a lot a beer for a lot of people, pabst is the way to go. For Christ sake there is a fucking medal on the can.

    • Mero

      Being Gay is a SIN and should be a CRIME…No Mercy……

  • Simon

    I don't get the triangle thing….

    • me either but

      Don't worry you probably never heard of it.

    • OwnerOfYou

      it's supposed to be ironic.

      • The_Dude_

        I don't get it how is a triangle ironic?

        Burning your house down with stress relief candles now that is irony.

        I guess I will just have to finally say what all of the old people used to say to me when I was listening to Nirvana and wearing my Nike Air Pumps. "What the hell is wrong with you kids" .

        • Simon

          So, if Irony is what hipsters seek, Alanis Morissette should be the Anti-Hipster.

          • Ned Flanders

            She may have been the original troll. There is irony in her song "ironic." The irony is that there is very little irony in it.

      • panama99

        Ahhh!

        Triangles are ironic and circles offer closure.

        Then the pentagon will offer stress and blockage and hardship because the man is alwyas trying to put us down.

        You know I'm starting to understand all this stuff……and bushy facial hair is another symbol, next we can talk about those bushy ass eye brows on the girl in #5

    • Saena

      It's a throwback to the 70's era of "pyramid power". A lot of art and architecture from the students of the 70's used triangles and shit. I assume since hipsters like vintage…

      • That Guy

        awesome. i think hipsters are this era's hippies. so it works on so many levels.

        • sarcasm

          No, Hippies at least contributed to the era they lived in, and spread peace, love, etc.
          HIpsters just dress ironic and bash people unlike them

          • http://www.facebook.com/evelyn.ponce Evelyn Ponce Quintero

            and came up with some pretty legit music and were also pot heads so they're automatically a million times better

  • http://thechive.com/ mattythegooch

    #2 – I actually own a few Fred Perry shirts……….and on that note……(the rest are a gaggle of twats!)

  • http://www.thechive.com DistractedIndividual

    #10 Buzzkillington parked there.

    • Texas

      great call

    • KPD

      Did I ever tell you the story of how cornmeal came to be?

    • StupidFresh3484

      "Now….who here likes a good story about a bridge?"

    • Paul

      This bout sums hipsters up.

    • 6655321

      The owner is clearly not a Scot.

    • ATG

      I live in that town and know for a fact that a 50-60 year old guy owns that bike. He is the OH I guess…

  • R.Pgh

    I thought Hipsters were just bargain shoppers who get clothes from the good will and are bad at shaving correctly….

    • Hana

      I think it has evolved to "I got this 'vintage' sweater at Urban Outfitters for $60."

    • Erick

      Jajajaja, LOL , you are correct….good one

  • Eeik5150

    Rage_guy.gif

    • James Westfall

      missed it by_ t h a t _much.

  • newscot

    #15 – same thing

    • http://www.facebook.com/johnbbest John Best

      Thats offensive to gays.

  • RayBoogs

    I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Fm

    Kurkimillis #1?

  • newscot

    Posts like this get my blood boiling…. I'm going back to look at asses now.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      Hell yeah ASSES! *HIGH FIVE*

  • disturbed

    #17 A 'shortbus special' kind of douche

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

      More like 'homeless special'

  • http://twitter.com/StrongAsMeat @StrongAsMeat

    #12 I'm sorry, but she's fucking sexy.

    • RayBoogs

      Yes she is, he is a cock.

      • T-ruckus

        However, I would also dress up like a Faggy Rabbit if it meant I got to bang her.

    • bunedoggle

      If I had to dress like that to get in her bloomers, so be it.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1521060132 Sterling Crawford

        Maybe that's the secret to why hipsters exist. It's solely because a bunch of girls decided they liked vintage, artsy crap, and they were hot. So naturally guys picked up on it. I mean really, do hot hipster girls piss you off anywhere near as much as the douches around them?

        • http://www.thechive.com DistractedIndividual

          Somewhat true…I'd bang him…But only because I have seen other pics of him not so hipsteresque.

          • rodan303

            Oh Distracted…Really? The bunny ears don't kill it completely for you??

          • Fasteddy14

            Even with the calamari stretched earlobe thing going on?

            • http://www.thechive.com DistractedIndividual

              I've always liked seafood:) Jk, it adds to the bad boy image..Too much can be ridiculous though.

    • beardpapa

      Apology accepted.

    • Chim Richels

      Yeah, she is pretty hot. She's a hot sexy streetwalking Alice.

      He's a pole smoking version of Flava Flav who most likely plays keys, kazoo and skin flute for some lame indie band with a dopey name like 'And We Envision Celestial Daffodils'

    • headless

      She is a fashion blogger named Keiko Lynn.

  • Coldzilla

    Hipsters

    Idiots

    Tomato

    Tomahto

  • Glitched

    #23 this troubles me…….

    #36 Yes!!!!

    • Dr_StrangePants

      People who buy fake glasses
      and never know the hassles of having to wear real glasses
      displease me

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