Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

  • Drewski

    i hate being first

    • Dead embryonic Cells

      and we hate you, so there's that

    • lovesthechive

      you still are an idiot

    • Drewski

      well, haters gonna hate

  • maclean

    #8 find her

    • Leeboy

      the only way is essex Maria Fowler

      • snoobs89

        i hate that show more than aids.

        • Killer Whale

          That show makes me embarrassed to live on this planet, even if I am a killer whale.

      • AnyoneForCoffee

        Yeah, we're very sorry about that show.

        And 'Made in Chelsea' too.

        Now excuse me while I have a brief fantasy about ripping all their heads off……

        • snoobs89

          two words that make me vomit in my mouth… "geordie shore"

    • MonkeyMadness

      That swimsuit has got to leave a funky tan line.

    • KyleRetrato


      You're welcome.

      • bill

        Thanks but no thanks.

      • Kyle

        no one thanked you.

    • aj1

      Maria Fowler. She's an English Glamour model and stars on the reality show "The Only Way is Essex"

    • Buzz

      Photoshoppers: ready, begin…

    • phideauxe

      Let me take this opportunity to thank the British women for their willingness to whip off their tops for our entertainment. Maybe some of our US ladies could learn from their example. Sounds like Maria must be on something similarly putrid as "Jersey Shore", but she is one hot piece of ass.

      Cheers! Love the women of the UK!

  • mcdouche

    beat you paula

  • Catence

    #26- hell no. But kudos to all those who have the balls to do that.

    • danimal

      crazy russians

    • ROK247

      oh yes that looks perfectly safe

    • KyleRetrato

      nice profile picture. Submit it. Now.

      • OWIejw

        google "boobs".

        you're welcome.

    • yepper

      take your top off already!

    • Dr_StrangePants

      It's even better with the audio

    • Dan1

      That looks like it can brake a spine.

    • nixt3r

      Didn't look like they had much choice.

    • http://www.thechive.com AdamBaldick

      Toss a bitch

  • Steven

    #7. Hahaha! True, Ill admit it.

    • Catence

      I would even take that one further:time spent finding the right spot in said porn. Can take a bit of time.

      • HillBilly Bone

        Yep. Let's see the pie chart on that one.

        • Beendone

          It's been posted here before.

      • yepper

        show us more of your tits catence!

    • bbqboobs

      Or when you open up a video in a tab and look for more videos while you wait for previously mentioned video to load.

      • NAACP

        Or when, instead of porn, you wait until it's dark out and wait outside your neighbors window for the real action. Am I right?

        • lick my nutz Paula

          not so much peeper, glad Im not your neighbor…or am I?

  • sarcasm

    #12 Good, kill the hipsters!

    • JP Souza

      I am not afraid of a Zombia apocalypse.
      I am afraid of a Hipster apocalypse. I fear it may have already begun.

      • JAS

        It has, but you haven't heard of it yet.

  • https://www.facebook.com/lukas.minnebo Lukas Minnebo

    #25 Om nom nom nom

  • saucypants

    #3 It's a trap!

    • Dagoth Wit

      we know

      • jpp407

        it's a fap!

    • Trev

      hey, I have that shirt too!

    • Malkintosh22

      That joke was implied in the picture, but thanks for pointing it out again.

  • Lower

    is Priceless.

    • AlwaysQuinning

      He's no good to me dead.

  • Nobody

    Dear Chive, there was some confusion this morning about the release time of your t-shirts this morning. The Street Fighter advert said they would be released at 9AM PST, when in reality they were released at 9AM PDT. Because of the confusion caused by this, I humbly suggest a reopening of the t-shirt orders. Obviously, those who would order at this point would know they would not get their shirt immediately, as you are out of stock, but I believe you would find a good number willing to trust you to send their order their way when you got more. But that's just my suggestion.
    Chive on,
    -the one you hate to love

    • Bill57

      no one cares paula

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Wasn't me.

    • suomynona

      The funny part about these T-shirts is that the Chive only orders a certain amount, be it 500, 750, 3000. Whatever the number. They are fully aware of how many people anxiously await the arrival of new tees. They could order 250,000 tees and they would all sell. So, why don't they do that? Because then the masses won't be in here posting, whining & complaining about the fact that the tee shirts sold out too fast yet again. Supply & demand. It's as simple as that. The Chive wants more demand and less supply. It keeps the masses coming back.
      Someone posted earlier this week that their credit card had been charged for the bumper sticker, yet they had not received them. Go check out the supply of bumper stickers. They have plenty. No demand there. So, they make you wait.
      Elementary, my dear Watson.

      • 4everDistracted

        …and John replied to the sticker issue, be sure to read that too.

      • snoobs89

        i see what you're saying but you are wrong, supply and demand doesnt really work that way. the chivery would only actually gain from creating scarecity of the shirt's if they could charge more for them. for example diamonds are expensive now because there isnt alot of them. but if i found a way to make huge diamonds from old toenails and vinegar, the price of diamonds would fall like snookis knickers. in reality i think the problem with getting the shirts in is more to do with their suppliers. they probably go local and get them made in batches of roughly 1 – 2 thousand. which i would guess would be roughly a week's lead time. they need to think big. get china on the phone but that would require an order of atleast 50,000 which needs alot of capital. $100,000+ which i dont think even john has lieing around.

        • Justin

          That's exactly what I was thinking when it came to financial issues. I think if they had the money to invest in more T-Shirts than what was supplied yesterday, they would have increased the order. Maybe not 250,000 shirts, but maybe a couple thousand more than what they previously had ordered.

          If only John would tell us how many they ordered so we could get an idea at just how many people received shirts.

          Also, there should be a limit on the # of shirts a person can order, seeing that people know they can sell them on Ebay and will order 10+ just to make a quick profit off the lack of supply.

        • colton

          @snoobs89, Actually, there are such a vast amount of diamonds that DeBeers and the Russian dealers keep them in 100's of enormous vaults and only release a few at a time to keep prices at a maximum. Sure they tell you that diamonds are scarce, but thats part of keeping the price high. suomynona is correct in theory, and is only missing out on the raising prices over time.

        • Allenavw

          This is the best possible comment reply I've ever read. I love "if i found a way to make huge diamonds from old toenails and vinegar, the price of diamonds would fall like snookis knickers." I'm crying I'm laughing so hard. Well done Admiral Snoobs :p

          • snoobs89

            ALLENA! sorry im being a slob when it comes to the emails..again.. i will try and pen one out today for you 🙂 one day i will make a break through with my old toenail & vinegar experiments. then im in the money!

            • Allenavw

              That’s okay, I know you’re busy and don’t have time for lil ‘ol me *looks to see if guilt trip is working* lol, kidding! I know old toenails and vinegar is your life’s work.

    • SparksHelene

      @you I just got a $829.99 iPad2 for only $103.37 and my mom got a $1499.99 HDTV for only $251.92, they are both coming with USPS tomorrow. I would be an idiot to ever pay full retail prices at places like Walmart or Bestbuy. I sold a 37" HDTV to my boss for $600 that I only paid $78.24 for. I use BidsOut.com

  • kdrat

    To explain my yesterday's post. I wasn't complaining. I am from Europe and I find it amazing that I can get my dose of DMA as soon as I wake up despite the fact there is 3AM in the US (the place where thechive was born) Keep it up! 🙂

  • alterator

    #23 … found him. But no one ever asks…HOW is wally.

    • tommybhoy

      I only found Vadar..who had just sliced someone's head off

      • TheAndychrist

        There used to be some fucked up shit in those books.

    • http://www.facebook.com/christopher.neufeldt Christopher Neufeldt

      That is one talented tattoo artist.

    • TDub66

      Ummmmmmm…..stupi…forget it

    • http://www.facebook.com/KaylaSmith43 Kayla Smith

      I found him, and he's lonely. I asked.

      • FlyingSpagMonst

        It's Waldo you tool.

    • http://twitter.com/ABQLifer @ABQLifer

      I prefer it when ladies keep it simple and have a target with "Aim Here" on their back…

    • daisygirl81

      Whew, glad I wasn't the only one who took the time out to look lol

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1430738200 Sumer Gill

    Dr Manhattan's Father???

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1478892837 Mark Sawa

      that or extremely aged superman

      • Jeff

        Or super old hipster, he was one before anyone had heard of them you know

  • PHUT

    #11 stretch the old legs

    • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

      Cant tell if GIF or just really long video..

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1478892837 Mark Sawa

    because fuck you that's why!"

    • 6655321

      You clearly don't get it.

      • Vlad

        I don't get it

      • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1478892837 Mark Sawa

        no. i did. it's called a sense of humor. something most chivers tend to miss in the comment section.

    • Justin

      If you do this, take out the fucking trash and don't tell the other people that live with you to do it because they put the last piece of trash on top?

      Nailed it?

    • snoobs89

      when i had housemates last it used to be if you where the one to knock it over then you loose and have to take it out. its the classic the trash jenga system.

      • Mort

        Per Homer Simpson, "it isn't filled until it's spilled."

  • KAl el

    Hole fuck I was looking at #15 for a minute and at the end I thought u added a face to his stomach but look at his stomach and he has as face. Fucking faces everywhere. Lol chive on

    • panama99


    • Puffy

      I'm mindfucking you right now.

      • dejd

        I hope youre wearing a condom cause i have a dirty mind

    • Dword

      Hope someone photoshops his actual face to his abs

  • kiddo

    #8 just wanted to say those are some great looking bewbs

    • NAACP

      mission accomplished.

    • Ahhhh

      If only I knew how to Photoshop.

    • Underbaker

      Mmmmmm Bewbs….

  • max

    If you do this…. you are fat?

    • snowboardstud911

      lol pizza boxes, cheez-its, oreos, and too lazy to walk outside. 'MERICA!!!

  • troutisafish

    #15 must have to shit Real bad.

    • loopy

      Bang on for Voldermort, that fucker turns up in some strange places.

  • HillBilly Bone

    "Hello. My name is Chuck and I'll be your tour guide today." #9

    • max

      cracked me up!

    • Red

      All sorts of win there.

  • moooo566

    #25 I am all out of nutella! How!?


    My dad told me i can be anything i want ,so i became a slut and got my semi naked pics posted on the internet. Victory !

    • NAACP

      better than someone who trolls said galleries.

      • GuestySuxBalls

        the irony of it is lost on their little brains….

    • Larry

      I think it's safe to assume you're as ugly on the inside as you are on the inside.
      Have a nice day!

  • its_forge 107p

    #7 Tell me about it ,its so hard to find bestiality videos.

    • snoobs89

      that comment just made me spit coffee all over my keyboard. fucking hilarious!

    • shoelessjoe

      good ones anyways..

  • true info

    Lame post is lame. Must be busy with the sexy skanks post.

    • HillBilly Bone

      Troll up early this morning?

  • Dashete

    #15 The face at the end kind remind me of Batman for some reason.

    • Machinist

      Because it kinda looks like Scarecrow, maybe?

      • panama99

        Or the hat from Harry Potter that assigns you to the houses……

    • http://www.facebook.com/dirubin Daniel Rubin

      not batman. Its Khem Val a companion character for the sith inquisitor in SWTOR

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