Daily Afternoon Randomness (48 Photos)

sopa sucks Daily Afternoon Randomness (48 Photos)

I’m making a late addition to the DAR today, and for good reason. There’ s an ominous law moving through Congress right now called SOPA. It targets ‘rogue’ foreign sites that torrent copyrighted films and music such as The Pirate Bay. Which would be alright I suppose except the wording of the SOPA bill is so poor that it ends up giving more far reaching power to our government than its intended purpose. SOPA effectively gives the government tacit permission to blacklist any site on the internet for even linking to sites like The Pirate Bay.

For example, sites like YouTube, Tumblr, and even theCHIVE could be effectively tossed into the void if a commenter decided to post a link to these ‘banned’ sites. Yes, this censorship bill is that disgusting. Google and Facebook have called the proposed bill ‘Draconian’.

Because our representatives in Congress have such a poor grasp of how important a free and open internet is, they’re simply going to pass this steaming pile unless we do something about it.

Read this article and watch the video. Then go to the American Censorship Day website and write your local representative to put an end to this deeply flawed bill (they’ve made it easy to do). The future of the internet could depend on it. Stop SOPA, save the internet.

Thanks and Chive On!


  • Claire


    Fucking Awesome.

    • http://www.tube8.com Troll_The_World

      FUCK YEAH! Great job! Did dudes still hit on you? LOL

    • http://www.facebook.com/michaeljtrent Michael Trent

      And cute.

    • non

      thats amazing I would take you out for drinks on a Saturday night

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1504369784 Alee Husmann

        Unfortunately, no, I did not get hit on by anyone. I wore a lot of old lady perfume, which everyone knows is the best way to ward off any dudes.

        Truth is, there was no doorman at the bar, so I sort of just walked in. I don't know what would have happened if I wasn't wearing nay makeup though. I could have bee stopped in the bar.

        As a loyal Chivette, you have no idea how much it means to me to be on the DAR. Keep calm and Chive on.

        • SolidusSnake420

          That is one of the most brilliant fucking ideas I have ever seen or heard of.
          Well fucking played.

        • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

          You are awesome.

        • SwingoutScott

          Well, I would go back as myself and try again! I'm sure the rest of the Chive would love a report. Then go back in the makeup and hit on all the young guys. See if you get to blow ones mind!

          • SwingoutScott

            By that, I meant first go back as yourself, then go back in makeup.

        • Pre. Mr. Bald.

          Surprised some drunk dude still didn't try to make a move. Did you stay until closing?

          I had a similar plan and started losing my hair when I was about 19. It didn't work out as well. I couldn't get into any bars, but it did help keep me from catching any STD's or knocking anyone up!

        • http://www.tube8.com SimonPhoenix

          Let me know which bar .. JUST SO I can say, that a chivette that made DAR hit on me!
          .(assuming you'd hit on me .. haa haa)

        • Edmund


        • Chris

          very awesome idea!

        • Antoine

          Long live europe πŸ™‚ 16+ Yihaaa

    • Biggus Diccus

      Uh oh Chive, I think you just gave a shit ton of college kids a great idea.

      • Bubba

        I see the headlines: "bars crowded by elderly"

    • http://twitter.com/Pekito_RL @Pekito_RL

      "Not sure if grandma, or young pretty girl"

    • Rich

      Beautiful girl, please never wear make up again

    • SenatorBurns!

      poor, poor americans and their 21 year old drinking age.

    • Squiggy

      This was a pretty ballsy move… it may have given everyone a little insight into what you are going to look like in 30 years…

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1504369784 Alee Husmann

        Oooo… hopefully I don't look like that in 30 years…

    • A BiPolar Guy

      The "old you" is a higher quality pic tan the real you. Could we please have a better picture of the real you? I'm sure all the guys here would like a better look at you. πŸ™‚

    • KHfan4evr

      Sooo epic.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Let's analyse some of the comments I get; more specifically the comments I get more than once. Today: "Die in a fire!"

    Paula's analysis: I feel… Passion. Lots of passion. Your insecurity about your seemingly never-ending virginity makes your proclamation of your burning feelings for me come out all wrong.
    This is not what you wanted to say. However: good for you; at least you tried! Who knows, if you keep this up you may one day lose that dreaded virginity of yours after all! Possibly even to someone of the oppsite sex!
    You are forgiven.
    Up next: "Go play in traffic!"

    – the one you love to hate

    • SkyVader

      You should have just said, "first" and gotten it over with.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        That would have been stupid as there was already a first post… Go die in a fire.

        – the one you love to hate

    • http://www.tube8.com SimonPhoenix

      really? This is what you choose to post in the Hump_DAR?

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Yeah, what else? I know what humps look like by meow.

        – the one you love to hate

        • http://www.tube8.com SimonPhoenix

          Point taken. You have (some how) claimed LG's true love.

          But you can still "Go die in a fire."

          • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

            I think Paula can be quite lovable at times, but only my boyfriend claims the true love title. …And I'm not so sure that trolls can die in a fire. I think it takes some other type of lethal arsenal to do the trick. Like puppies and rainbows and shit like that. πŸ˜‰

            • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

              Nooooo no no no. No. There is nobody in your life but me. That roommate you keep around to keep your parents thinking you're normal doesn't count.
              Still I want to punch him in the face and run him over with a truck, not necessarily in that order.
              Try giving me kittens to see if I melt. I'm hungry.

              – the one you love to hate

            • http://www.tube8.com Troll_The_World

              or kittens? Painted black and white spots and taken to a soccer field?
              See #37

    • AssClown
      • Bluto

        Said the meme that spelled it "serverely"…

    • earl

      Why don't you go get face fucked by a bus…

    • i heart paula

      paula my days are incomplete until i read something snotty you wrote…

    • Billy

      Almost under 100 keep thumbing it up. It secretly pisses it off.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Oh what the fuck, I'll be below 100 today or tomorrow I guess.
        Meow see if that makes me melt or whatever.
        Oh and if I want the score to go down, don't you think I have ways to do that? Have faith, little Billy.

        – the one you love to hate

    • Everyone

      Die in a fire!

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Please eleborate! I'm off to bed right meow so I'll read (and grade) your work tommorowsies.

        – the one about to dream of …

        • Black6dog

          Note to whomever cares, Paula lives somewhere in Europe or more easterly. We're catching on to your game Troll. A few more mistakes and we'll know just where to amass the mob.

    • Black6dog

      I'm a big fan of "Kill it, kill it with fire!" Lolz everytime

    • DDay


    • Can't spell

      It's ANALYZE, dummy.


      can suck it!

      πŸ™‚ just kidding.

    • hyperpsacedisco

      Oh hun, you're quite desperate for any kind of attention aren't you? Why don't you just make your own troll-tastic website instead of piggy-backing off someone else's to get the attention you so crave?

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        I don't have the time to start my own site.
        Also, Chivers are such lovely minions… ❀

        – the one you love to hate

        • http://www.facebook.com/ tara

          i got to say you are annoying sometimes but it wouldn't be a post with out reading one of your comments

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            The fails, THE FAILS!
            "i got to say you are annoying sometimes but it wouldn't be a post with out reading one of your comments"
            * Capitel 'I' at the begining ot the sentense;
            * without is one word, not to;
            * period at the end of the sentense;

            – the one you love to hate

            • Dan


              • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

                You kidding? That's the only error you found?

                – the one you love to hate

                • Adam_R

                  lol up vote.

    • Guibombe

      Minus 69: Should I preserve it or add a dislike?

  • Sharky

    #15 The dress one is waaaaay better

    • big perv

      I still want to see it in reverse though

  • stever

    #47, #48

    You mapped out a tush shot. And you'll be my hero today

    • A-Rex rawrr

      just fapped out on that tush shot

  • Intensemasterdebater

    #26 More like The Female Michael Strahan

    • rapanui

      that is a face painted on a bicycle stand with hair.

    • Andre Young, Ph.D.

      Gap so big, my dicks gotsta fit!

    • mikey

      I thought it was a Jackson sister….

    • Obrien

      Fuck that. I'd do Strahan before I'd do her, and I'm a dude.

  • Bryan

    DAR is early!

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #12! My dear muse looking lovely as ever… <3<3<3
    Why the awkward stance in the second part though? Oh wait, I remember, that was just after we had sex. Never mind…

    – the one you love to hate

    • Itsa you

      Narcissistic onanism.

      • coastie

        Exhibitionist. Not everything in life is a negative, idiot.

    • DrROBOTO

      on a side note in #8 when she says thats the same snake does she mean the same snake in reality that they used to make the movies or literally does she mean the snake in the harry potter world, the one he sets free in the zoo winds up being voldemorts horcrux?I call bs on that cause all the horcruxes would have been made long before harrys' incident at the zoo and also he set that guy free, no way hes gna try and kill him multiple times…Im confused…

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        You hijacking meow? That's low for you.

        – the one you love to hate

      • Jag

        Logistically it makes sense for the simple fact that there aren't exactly a whole lot of giant fucking snakes in England.

        • tara


          Not a whole lot of people who care about whatever your complaining about today.

          • DrROBOTO

            doesnt fit the timeframe, plus mort spends alotta time outside england at these times. And sorry tara, maybe next time john will reference the notebook or making a sandwich…

            • tara

              Well hmmmmm, I do like to cook, I mean I didn't go to culinary school for nothing.

            • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

              Talking about fictional snakes in a topic about the ever so lovely and charming <3Lauren<3 , you guys sure lack manners…

              – the one you love to hate

      • Kels

        Voldemort didn't make all of his horcruxes at once, he spread them out over time. Nagini was the last one

      • rockstar323

        Nagini was actually the last Horcrux to be created. He made her one between the books/movies Prisoner of Azkaban and Goblet of Fire. No clue if he owned her before he tried to kill Harry the first time or if he just found her when he made her one.

      • FolleRousse

        Not a true quote, the title isn't even right it was the sorcerers stone.

        • Ryker

          The book was originally released in the UK, where it was known as the Philosopher's Stone. The stone that, when created with alchemy, would supposedly grant everlasting life.

        • newscot

          It was only called Sorcerer's Stone in the US. Everywhere else it's Philosopher's Stone.

  • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

    Hump Dartoons are awesome!

    • Mappin' it out

      preparing for rear entry? i would prefer a better view of that yellow thong, first in place and then pulled to the side real nice. What say you, LG?

  • manicmachine

    Early Hump DAR!!! ftw

  • mark donovan


    hadn't heard of Josh until last week and didn't give 2 shits about x factor. Then saw him do Joe Cocker's 'Little help from my friends' and was sufficiently blown away. I'll be watching tonight. Good luck, Josh.

    • Burt

      The Beatles

      • Harmonica

        i live in germany and i actually started downloading the aired episode first thing thursday morning to watch him do his thing.
        too bad i have to get up early tomorrow so i cannot vote
        i really hope he wins and is intelligent enough to make his own thing afterwards, and not be pushed around and do what his record label wants

      • Phil

        He sang the Joe Cocker version…

    • Chivacy Please

      Yeah…even saw him sporting a BFM shirt during his intro.

    • https://www.facebook.com/Luispedrosato Luis Pedro Gonçalves

      He sure is funny

  • Poonchinello

    This Randomness appears daily. Usually in the afternoon.

    • guest

      no matter how many times you write it, it will not be funny

      • ale

        yes it is…

      • Poonchinello

        Ah, the power of the internet. No matter how many times I am told it isn't funny, it will have zero effect on the regularity of my writing it. And yet, I will venture a guess that you will continue wasting time reading such asinine comments, and wasting even more time pointing out the fact they they are asinine. I doubt you are envious or jealous in any way of any commenter, but the reply is the only validation we shall receive, and in this case you have given it.

  • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

    Your friend is delightful.

    • carl


    • gromtown


    • MOAR

      One moar for good measure. MOARRRR!

    • ROK247

      she should call that dress the erection inducer

      • carl

        i was gonna say "boner dress" but that might give the wrong impression

    • Vanilla Gorilla

      I'm going to have to go with a "make fuck" to that one!

    • sam

      awesome! burn-tightdress-flbp, if she was smiling in the picture we could add another

    • SKEWED

      Sucks to be stuck in the "Friend Zone", huh?!

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #19 I call it "Pokey Pokey"

    – the one you love to hate

    • carl


  • http://www.facebook.com/7kris.witha.k7 Kris Coleman

    I LOVE when the DAR is early

    but then when I get home from work, I'm sad because I don't have a DAR to check
    (first world problems)

  • Indy


    Now that's just creative as hell – and for alcohol no less

    • Inviolability

      And she is a cutie!

  • AssClown
    • VedHead77

      It's as if that dog has done that before. "She's in the position again…".

      Pavlovian fail. Or Pavlovian win?

    • Billy

      Well that's one way to avoid the chive staff.

    • http://dirkpittfan.tumblr.com/ thatwasfun

      haha actually got a good laugh out of these, thanks

    • ROK247

      looks like scruffy might have hit paydirt there right at the end

    • mouchette

      laughin out loud at the ff post

    • Dr_StrangePants

      disapproves of pedobestiality

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002013562507 Jordan BamSham Couick

      Both of these had me rolling

    • teh dude

      What is it with dogs and humping people who fall down hills.

  • Woody

    #24..too fuckin funny !!!!

    • http://thechive.com/ GernBlansten

      1 down, 3 trillion to go.

    • http://www.facebook.com/evelyn.ponce Evelyn Ponce Quintero

      that one definitely made me LOL πŸ™‚

  • http://www.douggoff.com Doug

    #4 Well that just made my afternoon.

    • HankT


    • https://www.facebook.com/Luispedrosato Luis Pedro Gonçalves

      MOAR please

  • KeepCalm

    #19 I think I speak for all Chivers when I say, we want MOAR!!!

    • carl

      much moar, asap

      • timmy

        moar meow.

    • Rach

      I'm a straight female and I want moar.

      …only mostly straight, after this apparently. πŸ™‚

  • techno_viking

    #12 LG FTW.

    • hMMMM

      #35 – Ellen's hotter. And she knows how not to ruin a good thing via overkill.

      • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

        There are lots of girls that are hotter than both Ellen and myself combined. I don't submit to the Chive because I think I'm god's gift to man, I submit because I like to support the site by providing original content. I also don't post my shit on this site so chill out. Ellen is an aspiring model and actress and I am a homeland security professional – I'm not looking to make a career out of my looks. I'm not trying to be anything but supportive of the site.

        • Truth

          tolls will be trolls

          • loves sammiches

            "…and rolls will be rolls, and without tolls, we don't eat no rolls. " ~Little John

            • thedude325

              haha awesome men in tights reference

        • http://www.tube8.com SimonPhoenix

          Don't waste TOO much time on the trolls, LG.
          Remembre, never argue with an idiot .. they just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

          FUCK YOU HHMM….. go hummm on a loaded revolver and pull the trigger.

          • the other Jen

            yeah, hmmm should definitely go kill himself b/c you don't agree with his OPINION, which by the way, he and everyone else has a right to express.

            and i don't think hmmm is a troll, he's a dickhead asshole for sure but i agree with a lot of the things he says.

            • The Real D. Nozzle

              Agreed. I love how all the fanboys think they're the only ones who can express an opinion, and that theirs is ALWAYS RIGHT.

            • the other Jen

              you really hijacked my name again? wtf?

            • http://www.tube8.com Troll_The_World

              So .. remind me EXACTLY where SimonPhoenix said that "MMMHHHH (or fill in the blank with whatever troll's opinion) opinion" didn't matter .. OR that SimonPhoenix's opinion was the only one that counted?

              EVERYONE is entitled to their opinion and the right to express said opinion. Just like I do .. I love how just because someone disagrees WITH YOUR opinion they are somehow denying you the right .. or wish that you had your right denied of having an opinion and then expressing it.

              Well SimonPhoenix had one thing right when he said .. "Not worth arguing with an idiot .. they'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience."

        • techno_viking

          And you're a homeland security professional? You just keep getting hotter….

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          You so silly. Hotness is WAY more than skin deep dear. And you… are a special kind of hot that way ❀ (for realsies!).

          – the one you love to hate

          • Cermak

            sick and tired of all you faggots sweating so hard on LG, shes an average girl, who HAS a boyfriend and wouldnt piss on you if you were on fire. get the fuck over it. fucking nerds

            • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

              Nah, pretty sure I'd do all that I could even if negative nancies like you were in a fire. Dedicating my life's work to homeland security and public safety kind of entails a certain personality, don't cha' think?

              Average girl with a boyfriend or not, I don't think anyone is actually trying to 'get with me' Cermak. They are just friendly people who also share a sense of community on this website and happen to be very nice and say encouraging and kind things (to all of us Chivettes, mind you). Maybe you need to get over all that angst and hatred yourself.

              • Chuck

                Pond in Fal.? Also Halloween pics last week- Captain Kidd?

              • LGisawhore


            • http://www.actionfiguretherapy.com SimonPhoenix

              Feel free to urinate on me anytime. I"ll even pay extra..! haa haa
              In ALL seriousness though, at least for me .. I enjoy LG's sense of humor, her quick, smart ass comments AND of course her sexiness. Yeah, THERE IS ALWAYS someone more attractive than someone else especially because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. WITH THAT BEING SAID, I personally think LG is physically gorgeous, as well both my GF & I really enjoy LG's photos, her artistic views and tastes as a photographer, and her overall creative approach to taking photos(GOTO HER WEBSITE AND SEE HER OTHER PHOTOS NOT JUST HER “Chivette Photos”). My GF appreciates that Lauren makes them relevant to certain posts OR because she has taken so many photos, that her (LG's) creative approach to "keeping it fresh" is MORE THAN WELCOME again and again AND not to mention appreciated.
              Plus, she sends stuff in and the CHIVE Overlords choose to post whatever pleases them in their fickle mood that day, so it's RARELY that LG (in her desperate addiction level need for attention that you accuse her of) gets fulfilled THAT DAY. Besides, I applaud the woman for taking down and changing her other posts, photos, blogs, whatever the fuck they were, etc. TO FOCUS on her professional Federal Career. I don't know what she does for DHS (nor do I care per se, if she gives it half the detail, dedication and attention she does other aspects of her life, I rest more safely at night) So, most of us don’t give a flying fuck about her talking to us OR her BF, because unlike you we don’t look at photos on the internet and begin to think how we can hook up with her. DON’T GET ME WRONG … looking at sexy chivettes and picturing what amazing fun it would be spend a night with them is FUN .. but it’s NOT A FUCKIN’ GOAL OR A REALITY dipshit. Anyways, LG can MORE THAN stick up for herself, she doesn’t need white knights .. we simply don’t want asschodes like YOU ruining the endless hours of amusement she provides the chive community. So please do a us a favor, drown your mother in fecal matter and pig’s urine, sodomize your father with a hot poker stick until it comes out of his penis hole and then chop his head off, murder whatever remaining pathetic waste of oxygen litter mates (I mean family) you have left, and then smash your testicles with a 20lb sledge hammer and rinse your mouth out with a loaded revolver. WE don’t want you or your worthless puke pile of litter mates (YOUR FAMILY) reproducing any more oxygen thieves leaving stupid comments and thereby slowing down connection speeds to thechive.
              Chive Community

              • Forever Alone

                holy shit. get a life. STAT!

              • Troy

                i saw the slab of writing immediately skipped to the next comment 😐

                • http://www.tube8.com Troll_The_World

                  While your at it .. skip right on over to that loaded revolver and rinse your mouthout with it!


        • Muadieb

          Right on LG! Also awesome that you're in homeland security! =D

        • https://www.facebook.com/Luispedrosato Luis Pedro Gonçalves

          Please continue to support the site, we need regular girls because because every one loves the girl next door

    • Silky Johnson

      LG is very pretty, but there is NO WAY a girl sends photos of herself to a website like this, without seeking attention and fan-boy praise. She seems like a nice enough girl, but I mean….can we drop the act?

      • Patches

        No no no, she is just trying to "support the site by providing original content"! (even though the chive has admitted getting thousands of sexy chivers submissions every week so they have absolutely NO need for "help" getting half naked photos, and by continuing to repost LG over and over and over they are actually reducing their original content and filling a spot that could be given to a girl who has never been on before)

        The overblown hyperbole from the fanboys has NOTHING to do with it, I'm sure. lol

        • Lotus

          Silky and Patchy nailed it, but you gotta admit its hard to beat LG's 2nd picture in #12. She looks perfect from that angle…

      • its_forge

        Why do you care what her motives are? This is the CHIVE. Look at pictures of pretty girls, go "oo! Pretty!!" and move the fuck on for Christ's sake.

    • http://www.thechive.com Lhturbo

      LG always makes my Day!

  • http://gravatar.com/thehusker thehusker

    #38 is my new dinner mat

  • Joe

    #24 I see what you did there…

  • Erin

    One of my friends said they saw Sarah Jay in the Chive offices (window) today doing a shoot πŸ™‚

  • Ltrain

    Good Luck Josh!

  • wyfair

    Early HUMP DAR!!! Woo! thank goodness on a day like today! #15 #38

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