Daily Morning Awesomeness (30 Photos)

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  • whosyopapi

    #4 Epic pole dancing is epic

    • Dear White People

      Between “Pi Day” and “St. Patrick’s Day” – I think March is your white history month.

      • The Chivers

        *insert smug condescending comment about black people because a white person would never make fun of white people, amirite?*

    • https://www.facebook.com/dylantracy413 Dylan Tracy

      These girls are wicked cool. There pole dance instructors. The girl on the bottem is a friend of mine

      • DaddyD

        *They're
        *bottom

        And any girl on the bottom is a friend of mine. As is any girl on the top.

        • Gumbydammit

          And heaven help the man the blonde wraps her legs around.

      • HARC

        If the hot redhead is really your friend tell her to submit more photos

    • Do0zer

      WTF? Why are they pole dancing in a ghetto?

    • ChipthemeatHayes

      I thought that was a hooker tree.

      • Hurricane Harri

        Ha! loved that comment!:D

    • Josh

      How Strippers wait for the bus.

  • https://www.facebook.com/swannerm Matt Swanner

    First!

    • troll hater

      idiot

    • Ethix

      You know everyone can see your real name, right?

  • https://www.facebook.com/swannerm Matt Swanner

    Crap…

  • ThePatriot

    #30 damn he's a stand up kinda guy

    • https://www.facebook.com/hannah.fontenot Hannah Fontenot

      And to think everyone makes fun of him for nothing really when you hear about all of this it puts things into perspective.

      • techno_viking

        "Hey Johhny boy!" – Patrick Swayze RIP

    • bud

      # 28 nicholas cat

    • Slim

      wonder if this is all true?

      • Nishtai

        Yeah, all of this is true. Well, I can't vouche for the B-day cake thing and the "Sad Keanu" answer, but the rest is pretty much common knowledge.
        He has something extremely human to him that you rarely find in Holliwood stars. And for that, I love this guy.

        Be excellent to each other, and KCCO

        • Rob

          I read about him helping one of the stars from the Help, it was just as the Matrix had come out and her car broke down and she wasnt famous either at the time and he helped her with her car on a busy street in Beverley Hills. He was extremely popular at the time and he still helped her out. Cool dude

          • Nishtai

            Being famous and popular doesn't turn you into an asshole. It just lets you be one and don't care about the consecuences

            • Nishtai

              What I mean is that You don't become an asshole when you become famous. You already were an asshole and being famous just enables you to be it openly. i.e: Russell Crowe

      • Ned_Plimpton

        The house thing isn't true. Here's his house…. Not exactly modest. He likes lots of windows and straight lines apparently.
        http://www.stylebistro.com/Celebrity+Homes/articl

        • DWebs

          Compared to other stars, that's modest.

          • Ned_Plimpton

            Ok.. But don't say, "I live in a flat. I have everything I need. Why live in an empty house?" when you're single and live in a $4.5mil LA mansion.

            • Internet

              Did you not see the previous post about a Cali dump going for 1.2 million. 4.5 seems about right for modest Beverly hills

              • PayHeed

                Weird it's Ned hating on everything… I bet you're real cool in person Ned.

            • Danny

              yea no kidding. What does he need the other 3 bedrooms for???

            • Pete

              He owns the house, he doesn't necessarily live there.

      • Zach

        He's also an atheist that drives a Porsche. Therefore, I don't like him.

        • jjj

          I like him even more now

          • tongystunter

            me too

            • http://www.facebook.com/charlie.thornblad Charlie Thornblad

              Me three

              • kbutt

                Therefore I don't like zach…seems fair.

        • txobmf

          What does that have to do with anything??

        • Stephen

          Atheist is fine, the Porsche is not.

          • Canadakid

            Its a 1996 Porsche. Worth the price of an Honda Accord.

        • Fish

          So he's an Atheist, Zach, who gives a shit? Just means he thinks for himself and is intelligent, unlike all the Christian Zachs in the World. GFY.

          • Son of Mongo

            Uncalled for, Fish. Uncalled for.

            ~ Catholic Chiver

            • Tonmi

              Being atheist doesn't make you smart, and being smart doesn't make you an atheist. (It sure seems to be a major factor, though). People are entitled to their way of perceiving the world as they see fit, but no one should get their panties in a bunch for ridicule of one's religion or lack thereof.

              • Bill

                I'm Christian and I consider myself to be smart and logical. I hold two college degrees. One in Computer Science, and the other in Computer information systems. The reason I am not an athiest is because I've had some things happen in my life that couldn't happen by chance. I don't take the Bible literally as many Christians do because if you read history you'll see that the Bible wasn't written by God(as many Christians unfortunately believe).

                BTW. I have more respect for Keanu now. Thanks Chive.

          • CthulhuReigns

            Apparently you don't know how to KCCO, Fish. If you don't like Christians that's up to you, but please don't play the same fiddle that most atheists I've met do.

            • http://www.facebook.com/matt.gabrielson.3 Matt Gabrielson

              He didn't say "all Christians everywhere always", he said "Christian Zachs", as in the Christians who automatically dislike atheists simply for being atheists as Zach did here.

          • matt

            fish i couldn't have said it better myself

          • Josh

            There are all types of religions on this site. Don't be so bigoted. What happened to KCCO?

        • gron

          Did you know you can buy a porche for less than 50K brand new?

          And besides, how can you hate on someone that donates 70% of his earnings to cancer victims, with out thinking that his god will reward him for that?

          • joel

            He's worth $350 million…

    • Saskguy26

      Wow thats an incredible story. I really hope the part about him donating all that money is true.

    • daveh873

      I don't know what I found more sad; all the stuff about Keanu or the fact that they had to refer to River Phoenix as "Joaquin Phoenix's brother"

      • Static

        No shit…I had to think for a minute who Joaquin was but I know who River is… c'mon.

        • guest-face killah

          "I'm on the drug!!!!!" that's for the Aussie chivers of a certain vintage….

          • Brendan

            I am of that vintage and Aussie and yes I know the rest

      • buddy love

        I thought the same thing

      • Ned_Plimpton

        I didn't think it was a big deal they said it like that. You people are too fucking soft.

        River & Keanu were awesome together in 'My own Private Idaho' for the record.

        • Pluff Mud

          By the end of the movie he was promoted to Brigadier General Idaho.

        • Markus Esq

          You are grumpy. Go get some cookies, you'll feel better.

      • breaklance

        Could of referred to him as "Kid Indiana Jones" from The Last Crusade. Everyone makes fun of Keanu for the Bill and Ted movies but they are funny. He may not be the worlds greatest actor but he's a helluva lot better of a human being than a lot of hollywood stars.

        • Spelling Police

          Could "have,' not could "of." I know "could've" sounds like the latter, but it's a contraction of the previous.

          • Jammy

            I say don't respond at all if all you to offer is spelling and grammar tips.

            • Iggy Catalpa

              "have" to offer. 😉

              "Hello, Kettle? This is Pot. 'YOU'RE BLACK!'"

          • Fish

            Nobody likes you, Sir.

          • SGT_Fati

            Should OF posted as grammar police…

      • Frank

        Probably because he has been dead for almost 20 years.
        That's a long time for someone to remember someone that was after all, a pretty mediocre actor.

    • B rex

      That is awesome. Nothing better than when someone is in a position that could easily be taken advantage of and they are humble and modest. I would like to think I would be like this too, but it would prob be pretty tough not to let it go to your head.

      • Visitorr

        Agreed, it's all easy to judge the rich celebs for their flamboyant lifes but I am pretty sure it is an helluva easy life to get used to, not to mention people on every corner telling you how awesome you are. I like that pic a lot, he's just a guy going somewhere.

    • red014

      And he knows kung fu.

      • Static

        Show me

        • Felcus

          I know what you're trying to do

          • Turbo68

            I'm trying to free your mind

            • truth

              There is no spoon

            • Felcus

              Load the jump program

              • Applefish

                Everyone falls the first time….

                • Woop

                  Woah.

                  • lol

                    lmfao!

                • SGT_Fati

                  Morpheus is fightin' Neo!

      • Thud

        "For the last time, no he doesn't."

    • mbns

      Chive should send him a complimentary KCCO shirt and maybe we'll see a pic of him wearing it in the future!

      • https://www.facebook.com/callmepappy Michael Pappy Doughty

        it has to be a bill and ted tribute

      • Woop

        We need a Keanu Chive T. SCK = Sad Cake Keanu

    • Shawny

      Keeeeanuuuuuu!

    • jimbozo

      I say there should be a post commerating Keanu. Maybe some Speed memes or Point Break references. Faith restored.

    • Bender

      We need a gold Keanu Reeves statue!

    • Poke4Life

      This is sad, but definitely moves him into the top 5 of most awesome down to Earth celebs out there!

    • Dave

      Snoopes should check this out.

    • http://thechive.com F3n1x187

      The guy is a Pro! Being that famous, you can't be more down to earth that that

    • nwf

      This was a bummer to read. It's good to have perspective on the mystery that is "Sad Keanu".

    • http://www.facebook.com/armina.frederick Armina Frederick

      there is a 100% likelihood that that made me cry.

    • epropst90

      Keanu Reeves – themed Chive shirt, maybe? 🙂
      I'd totally buy it

    • jerrybusey

      So ignorance is bliss but idiocy isn't?

    • Matt

      I'm inspired.

  • Johnny

    FIRST!!!!! DDDDDAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!!!!

    • Fall

      First idiot of the day, but certainly not the last!

      • Johnny

        Thank you for responding. Hopefully you won't be the only idiot to do so.

        • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=14830698 Frank Prill

          You showed him Johnny!

    • Mars

      Derp!

    • http://www.facebook.com/evening.s.barron Whiskey Rose Knight

      Not first, not the DAR.

      • Jammy

        boobs?

    • M-Shizz

      FUCKING TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

  • Jules

    #24 I love seeing people rescue animals! Faith in humanity restored. 🙂

    • Greg

      Yep! And then they go on eating meat because as long as one cant' see the animal die, it's all ok.

      • passwordistaco

        Everything dies, not to eat them would mean they just died in vain.

        • Guesting from NW

          If god hadn't meant us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat. Why refer to god as a he and not a she? See first point.

      • Dylan

        It's one thing to mercifully kill a fully grown animal to then use it's body to sustain life. It's another thing to watch a baby animal drown to death.

        As a side note, it's interesting you assumed they eat meat. I guess vegetarians would have been to weak to help?

    • Anonymous

      'Merica!

      • it's a joke

        goat bangers

    • SIUADO

      "can't let my date drown!"

    • Mr_Taco

      Silly Jules, they're just rescuing their lunch.

  • Rollout25

    #23 NOW KISS

    • Katiewoman

      Have you seen that film?
      They do kiss!!

      • Kyle

        What film is it?

        • Applefish

          "Our Idiot Brother".

  • 6655321

    #30 You'd think with all those sense memories he's be able to channel it towards acting.

    • Devin_Medrano

      Maybe all those bad memories repressed his emotions.

      • https://www.facebook.com/jpstrauss Juann Strauss

        His portrayal of Neo was spot-on.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      *knock knock*
      Whose there?
      Troll.
      GTFO!

    • Jimbo

      To all of those who say Keanu can't act. Watch Johnny Mnemonic. Fucking Academy Award-material right there.

      • Nishtai

        I'd say watch "Bill & Ted Bogus Journey". That's Golden Globe and Oscar acting right there. And I am just HALF joking.

      • IpointOutTheObvious

        Were you on meth when you saw that? That's the only way you could come to that conclusion.

    • Tulsa Chiver

      You don't not type no good…

    • 0331

      He can too act…Just one way.

    • Son of Mongo

      You now have as many dislikes to your comment as there are days in the year. Glad I could be #365!

    • Spywith1eye

      Dude hes rich your not game over!

  • pingpong

    #23 both turned out pretty good

    • MrHat

      I respectfully disagree. Rashida Jones turned out wonderful, but I can't stand Zooey Deschanel. Her whole Siri commercial didn't help her case.

      • 4309

        thank you! i have no idea why people go on about that chick. the quirky/hipster/manic-pixie bullshit is grating.

        • vinnychase

          zooey is hot but rashida jones puts her to shame. shes too bomb

    • matt

      i guess thats what being hollywood kids does to you. no matter how ugly you start off, all the money in the world DOES in fact make you beautiful

  • Rollout25

    #29 I would be a lot more excited to put up Christmas lights if I had her

    • Vic

      we need MOAR of this sexiness!

    • Mr_Taco

      Electrocution in 5….4….

  • OneClownShoe

    I'll have some cake with you, Keanu.

  • Benji07

    Sad Keanu…. is really sad…. wow.

    • bud

      kinda dark

      • Keanu Reeves

        DURRRR KEANU!!!!!

    • Roger

      Who ever hear…. of a sad clown??

  • Matt

    #4 Stripper poles should be installed at all intersections.

    • DaddyD

      with strippers, 24/7

    • Beantown

      Would be more effective than a stop sign

  • rromero

    #19 my whole meal is a lie!

    #23 Big crush on Zooey Deschannel, consider the lesson learnt

    • Parks and Rec

      Rasheeda Jones is in her mid thirties and still a bombshell. Recently discovered she was half white and half black! Always thought the ''nappy'' hair was a dominant trait but hers is like white people's.

  • http://thechive.com ontherun1989

    #29 MOAR!!!

  • This

    #30 That's deep.. suddenly I appreciate what I have a lot more.

    • seriously wow

      I never liked him, till now.

    • BruceBonsai

      Thats some deep shit Shane, some deep shit.
      -The Replacements

    • Matt

      He gets mocked for his stoic acting style, but as a person he's actually pretty deep and brilliant. The guy read Marcel Proust in his spare time for fun…the entire seven-volume series.

      • Ryan

        I wonder how many people are going to Google Marcel Proust?

      • qteam3d

        Now I know why he is the way he is. I read half of Swann's Way 21 years ago and still haven't fully recovered from the coma.

    • REVOLVER_KAZ

      Keanu's the bomb.

  • Swiss Chalet

    #16
    I keep thinking you just might turn around. Moar?

    • Slim

      olivia munn is just drop dead sexy

      • Kevin Pereira

        she's got an average ass. smaller than average tits. hardly any curves. has a smile that's dead behind the eyes, and is an attention whore who's famous for being an attention whore(don't give me any of that bullshit about her being funny. she's about as funny as Dane Cook). what's not drop dead sexy about that. aaand cue the thumbs down from the fanboys.

        • Buzzin_Neon

          or maybe cue the thumbs down for all the negativity and hate…

        • its_forge

          Sexy isn't about the size of your body parts Kevin.

  • Jack_LeMac

    #30 Good guy Keanu

    • AnyoneForCoffee

      This is a deserving meme….

    • Thor

      Also, he rides a Norton Commando.

  • stumeister

    #22 Why being bitten by a radiactive Spider makes for a better super-hero then being stung by a radioactive Bee.

    • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

      Because now the bee is dead.

      • Plurp

        Yes. He must have really pissed it off for it to go kamakazie on him like that.

    • George Zip

      WHERE THE F*CK IS MY EPI PEN? AAAAAAHHHH!

  • greg

    #29 is incredible!

  • RealZoo

    #9 <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-5899" title="watch-out-we-got-a-badass-over-here-meme" src="http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/watch-out-we-got-a-badass-over-here-meme.png&quot; alt="watch out we got a badass over here meme" width="325" height="250" />

    • grego

      fuckin"o"for orsome

    • https://www.facebook.com/ryan.cheek.7 Ryan Cheek

      Little did we know….earlier that morning he was bitten by a radio-active spyder.

  • stumeister

    #27 Fuck this is so true!

    • avgejoe

      I dropped a nacho cheese fry down there once…..i was like faaaaaaack! I hope it doesnt mold cuz i aint ever gonna get it out lol

    • Shiftycap1

      I bought this thing and it completely eliminated the Black Hole. http://www.buydropstop.com/

      • Shiftycap1

        Note: NOT SPAM. Just trying to help out my Chive brethren.

        • Billy

          Fuck that, just stick a towel there. Works just as good.

          • thom

            That picture is of a mid 2000's Dodge Durango, and is the exact color of mine and it is totally true.

  • rromero

    #4 do someone teach the to do that or is in their genes?

    • http://www.facebook.com/MichJackman Michael Jackman

      i had to reread your post about 5 times to understand the the hell you were trying to say… you engrish so good -.-

      • rromero

        I was just trying to type fast and I didn't proofread, ¿prefieres español?

        • http://www.facebook.com/MichJackman Michael Jackman

          ahh the over excitement of the chive can get you every time lol

    • hjd

      I think it's in their shorts

      • DaddyD

        I would like to be in their shorts.

    • Mike

      Even this illiterate dude knows the correct there/they're/ their. Wow!

      • rromero

        Not quite sure how to take that, and is not a surprise that I know the difference, that people whose first language is English is.

    • MrHat

      I'd like to get into their jeans. Not as funny when typed. Damn heterographs..

    • Yoga Pants 2012

      But they're not wearing genes…

    • https://www.facebook.com/dylantracy413 Dylan Tracy

      There actually pole dance instructors. Not strippers. The girl on the bottom is a friend of mine. Her and her sister are wicked cool girls

      • Kristen

        So…did you tap that ass, or what? Does she swallow?

    • Cecil

      what?
      I'm not being a dick, I just can't figure out what the underlying message of that was.
      Did you mean:
      "Did someone have to teach them pole dancing as a skill, or is it an inherent biological process such as an instinct?"

  • Dave

    #9 would hurt my dick BAD

    • Dave

      all one and a half inches of it

    • its_forge

      Eh, my dick is made of cast iron and old saddle leather, no worries there

  • stumeister

    #21 So rad, just don't know where to begin on this Extreme Alternative PETA offending sport

    • Dylan

      One's yawning & the other is licking his lips. Those dogs are loving it.

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