Daniel Tosh, the quotidian (20 Photos)

  • http://www.facebook.com/shannon.coverdale.3 Shannon Coverdale

    #11 LOL

    • Underbaker

      So since Patrick is a pink star does that make him an asshole?

      • Jen

        Yes! yes, it does!

    • Harry Longbahls Jr

      *you're….and *you're

    • Samhedi

      He is about as funny as cancer, or, y'know, rape.

      Which is to say, not funny at all.

      • WHY

        If you don't think Tosh is funny you are pathetic. He jokes about things that make all races unique/funny…races (we are different you know(not the rape part obv)). If you can't see that then you honestly have no sense of humor. Blacks can't swim, mexicans work hard, asians are calculators, indians smell like curry and whites can't dance/jump. Seriously, when the time comes that we can all laugh instead of take things out of context is the time we will all coexist. Seriously

    • sean

      except its FUCKING FAKE, just like most every "funny" celeb tweet nowadays. Thats not Tosh's actual twitter…

  • Nick

    Such a rofl!

    • feminist

      Daniel Tosh is a weak-minded fool.

      • Mos

        You don't have to like the person to laugh at the jokes. It seems like you're the weak-minded fool.

  • http://twitter.com/MirandaKGaines @MirandaKGaines

    #16 Ain't that the truth!

    • Christian

      With some cheese on it!

    • Curiousgeorge

      Especially if you die a virgin!

  • Salt

    He's no Mitch Hedberg, but he has skills.

    • https://www.facebook.com/DannoRules Danno Maurer

      RIP Mitch! Miss ya buddy

    • Navin R. Johnson

      You're damn right he's no Mitch hedberg..Mitch hedberg was funny

    • Teabagger

      Still better then Louis CK. Someone shoot that idiot.

      • MattyDeuce

        Louis is hysterical. If you don't like him, you don't understand adult humor. Then again, you are "Teabagger," so I wasn't expecting you would get his comedy.

        • yup

          Hes not funny, and you are a fucking tool, go drown yourself.

      • yup

        THANK YOU! Both him and that asshat from curb your enthusiasm should be fucking shot.

    • itsmekeneg

      Enter text right here! Mitch Hedberg is my fave..

  • Josh

    #20 Yes please.

  • A.E.

    he is a genius

    • FunKiller

      I wouldn't quite say genius…..he's good, but genius?

    • YOYO

      his writers are genius

    • MattyDeuce

      He is good at delivering his jokes, I'll give him that

  • http://twitter.com/TAndrewarhol @TAndrewarhol

    He is a hero, getting paid to be the biggest douche on Earth.

  • jttttt

    So much funnier than dane cook. Man I hate dane cook.

    • hiding out at work

      And he doesn't steal jokes like Dane cook

      • Arby

        Hannibal Burress is hilarious. If you don't know him check him out

      • Gary

        yes, he does. do a little research.

    • Navin R. Johnson

      I dont know how to vote on this..I mean I hate Dane cook, but this douche is the 2nd most unfunny comedian on the planet..so how do I vote?

      • 40398


    • Teabagger

      You could throw Louis CK in the mix.

    • bigcityreem

      Dane Cook is so f**king lame.

    • Funny

      Coarse, It really doesn't take much to be funnier than dane cook. I have no sense of humor at all and I'm funnier than him.

    • imeanreally

      shouldn't you compare Daniel to another comedian?

  • SlimtwigMJ

    #19 Yup

    • Stan

      It needs to say. Any dog bigger then a cat

      • Stan


    • lukinhas


  • xocalixo


    "are these nickels??"

    "yeah! I'm a baller on a budget bitch!!"

  • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

    "hey brett they wanna offer u a job on the practice squad"
    "whats that pay"
    "about 400 grand"
    "yea ima keep playin"

    • Why Oh Why

      STFU Jerkoff

  • TomTheCameraGuy

    #11 You're*

    • its_forge

      2nded, I don't care how funny the motherfucker is, if he can't use the right "you're" he can go fuck himself.

      • Jesus

        That's not his twitter account, that's a fake.

    • pvtguerra

      i cant like this enough

    • Danyx

      Omg, thank god you did that. Because if you didn't, I was going to.

  • Nico

    Still better than Rob Dyrdek and his show "Ridiculousness".

    • Max

      Rob Dyrdek is such a tool now!!!

      • Gary

        what wigger isn't?

    • Travis

      Was that even a debate?

  • richmackin

    I get that Chive needs ad money to run such a great site for us to enjoy for free, but how I despise these sponsored posts.

    • tim

      especially with it being tosh every time. I can't stand this douchebag. Please find a better sponsor

      • http://www.facebook.com/evening.s.barron Whiskey Rose Knight

        I don't really like him all that much either :/ but he has some funny one-liners

      • Bill Murray

        THANK YOU! the guy has no charisma. no comedic timing. and he just rips off his comedy and rehashes the same damn routine of saying shit that isn't shocking to anyone who isn't a suburban soccer mom.

    • R.Pgh

      Yeah, reading funny quotes is the worst

      • Randy

        Agreed^ laughing at these quotes was a huge waste of my time….damn you humor!

      • Wannabang

        Yeah, I would rather be fishing

    • Jason

      The sponsored posts are obvious, just don't click on them. Easy as that.

    • ...

      Don't bitch they're the reason the chive can keep making and selling tshirts

      • Simon

        I've got a feeling the selling shirts kind of pays for the making of them. I'm not good on the big picture though, but his opening line sort of said the same as you.

  • danguba

    I don't think you know what "quotidian" means.

    • TomTheCameraGuy

      But derp, it has the word "quote" in it….

    • teddyp

      quotable + comedian

  • Stick

    Inb4 'Hurrr, he's a rapist! Burn him alive!' comments.

    • richmackin

      I do wonder if the "I can't think of a wittier comeback than rape references" event is what's encouraging an added boost of PR at what could be considered his market demographic. At least we're not subjected to the horrible videos from the previous Tosh sponsoring of the page, and these are actually his high points.

      • Stick

        He wouldn't have used rape as a come back had they not been speaking of rape at the time.

    • FarmBoy

      I read that in the Mocking voice Tosh does, and envisioned him saying it, pretty funny.

  • That guy

    Personally I think the best comedians are the ones that don't try to be as "dirty" as possible to get a laugh. So the search continues….

    • That other guy

      Jeff Foxworthy… say what you will, but he made it big and never did "dirty" material…

      • That guy

        Oh yeah, there definitely are some good ones out there. Jeff Foxworthy, Jim Gaffigan… but it does seem few and far between. I guess I was talking more about comedians in general, especially the newer ones. I guess I should have had a sidenote to my "so the search continues…" comment.

        • thedude325

          Gaffigan is hilarious, except for that weird voice he does…

    • R.Pgh

      so Bill Cosby and……..

    • parkatola

      Try Brian Regan. He's admitted that his shows used to be 95% clean, and he was getting great reviews. So he figured, why not just take out the 5% off color stuff, and now families can come to his shows. Look for some of his stuff on YouTube. KCCO

  • iXOredheds

    #4 So true!

  • melindu

    I think of Daniel Tosh whenever I drink a Snapple and read the Snapple facts on the lid. 🙂

  • MistaDabolina

    daniel tosh is not funny

    • Jawbone

      You, however, are a cunt. the universe balances.

    • Buck

      If you don't think he's funny, it's because you're not smart enough to get his material.

      • Buck's Dad

        ……..really? you take the short bus, don't you?

    • nlc

      Odd, cause when he speaks people laugh. Either you're one of the few sane, intelligent people who finds him not humorous or the stats point toward you being a douche.

  • http://twitter.com/MirandaKGaines @MirandaKGaines


    Ballin on a budget BITCCCHHH!

  • @lackofabetter

    "Know whats better than a murdered out Honda Civic? Any Audi" -Tosh

  • Navin R. Johnson

    I think of Daniel Tosh, vs Dane cook, vs carlos mencia whenever I think of a good old UNfunny douchebag contest> I surely don't see what you people laugh at from these tools.

    • Mons

      Then don't read the post and take the time to make stupid comments

      • Tru Chiver

        exactly. anyone who doesn't share the same opinion as us is a stupid poopie face! KCCO

    • Teabagger

      Don't forget Louis CK. How the hell did he get a dam TV show?

      • Really?

        That's sarcasm right? Or are you just mad the canceled the redneck comedy tour?

    • Jawbone

      Go juggle cats.

    • its_forge

      Totally this!! Who's the unfunniest piece of shit getting paid to tell jokes!!?? Still Cook, but Mencia's second and this fuckface is a very very close third.

      • Navin R. Johnson

        exactly. You know those kind of people that dont get satire, and post replies to it like "this isn't real guys"..well those are the people who think Tosh, cook and mencia are funny..

        • ImpressMe

          I figured it out…you're a damn hipster…and probably posting under more than one name…. A freaking hipster douche…. Congrats….must be amazing to be you.

    • chiver

      he's not funny…probably funny to people that watch the "Big Bang Theory" another so-called comedy that's just not funny but people rave about…go ahead, let the flames begin

      • Nick

        I like turtles…….

    • Brent

      at least his name isn't narvin. God that name would suck lol.

      • NARVIN

        Hey! Narvin is a cool name, that's what my mommy tells me

  • Schafs

    Jim Jeffries…..the best comedian out there today look him up.

    • Littlet

      HEY i LOVE RALPHIE MAY or RON WHITE…Daniel is a different type of comedian. He is WAY better than Dane Cook.

    • http://hollywoodsniper.com livinggeek

      You are a good person. Jim Jefferies kills on stage an nobody seems to care. "You just made this rape really awkward" is one of the funniest sentences I've ever heard.

  • videologic

    none of these are funny, he just seems like a dick

    • its_forge


    • Jake

      isnt funny, only extremely conservative. boring.

    • MohawkJon

      Better than Dane cook trying to make a joke off the Colorado shootings last week…

      Thats not a joke, the dick really tried to make a joke off of 12 people's death.

      • Ch8ew

        yeah. cause no one ever makes jokes about AIDS, wars, poverty, or anything else that makes people suffer and die, amirite?

        • MohawkJon

          Compliment for Tosh idiot.
          How many comedians made fun of the Columbine shootings or 9/11 a week after?
          You want your death to be made light of after being horribly murdered a week before-hand?

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