While I was rebounding from a 5-year relationship, I went on a sort-of date with this weird dude from my community college who kinda stalked me, but was pretty much harmless. We went to buffalo brothers, and he ordered 2 dozen wings with their ludicrous sauce.
If you’ve never had this sauce, picture the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten, and multiply that by 1,000. I sat and stared in horror as he began eating. He had tears, snot, and sweat rolling down his face and dripping onto the table, but I guess in some attempt to impress me, he finished every single wing.
He immediately excused himself to the bathroom and vomited everything up, came out crying, and took me home. He did pay for dinner, though, which was nice. Once we got to my house, he tried to kiss me. Noooooope.
Second date. Went zorbing. Anyone who doesn’t know what it is, you get strapped in to a giant inflatable ball and rolled down a hill. It was awful, the ball wasn’t inflated properly so every rotation you hit the floor it hurt, it was wet so there was water inside the ball and we had to jump out at the bottom of the hill into a puddle so wet sock galore.
The whole experience was horrible. Gave us something to talk about though, been together nearly 4 years 🙂
Had a good friend at University who disappeared overseas for a year after we graduated. I stayed there to study and teach, and one day I got a text from a number I didn’t recognize saying “hey, it’s Joe from business school, want to catch up for a coffee?”
Hadn’t seen him in ages so I said yes very enthusiastically. I walked into the coffee shop at the right time, look around for Joe, and there’s Joe from business school. A different Joe from business school.
I couldn’t walk out because he’d already seen me, so we chatted politely for an hour and we’ve never talked since.