Today my horoscope told me to avoid saying things that will upset my partner. It also mentioned that things are good, even though things can be bad. In other news, water is wet, beer is tasty, and I have no shot with Mila Kunis (prove me wrong Stars).
I’ve read fortune cookies that had more accurate predictions than most horoscopes, so suffice to say I don’t believe too much in astrology or the zodiac (I do, however, believe in Zodiac, the phenomenal David Fincher film). I wish I did, though. I can’t think of a better reason to explain my shitty behavior than, “what can I say? I’m born in May and one of the planets is a little too close to another planet, of course I’m going to be an asshole.”
So from this skeptic to you all, here’s a collection of astrology memes that put my healing crystals into retrograde (I have no clue what that means).
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